Please, Mike. Don't lower yourself to the level of your lower, most fawning acolytes. I might lose respect for you. I know that, despite your playacting, you are not literally 100% literally minded; that, when you choose to, you can recognize metaphor, symbols, irony, tropes, and suchlike uses of the English language. I know that you know how to read a headline. We all know that you know that a headline, all headlines, are attention-getting devices. The purpose of any headline is to hook the reader, get her to read the article, or the thread, that follows. (That is why the marginally literate are so often offended or angered by headlines. Headlines are, of necessity, exgagerated, garish, colourful, emotion-enducing, attention-grabbing *****' crows.)
Thus "Can HBD Customer Service Speak English." The purpose of the thread was to provoke discussion of the thought that HBD might be able to communicate information about their downages better, more timely; primarily to provoke tzentmeyer's discussion of said thought. That goal has been achieved. Thus my grand, manly "W" flies high and proud, for all HBD to view, share in and enjoy. (As your abject "L" languishes in the dust of defeat and embitterment.)
This great and glorious triumph - not just for myself but for tzentmeyer and all of HBD - could not have been achieved if this thread had not been read. And the thread might not have been read but for the provocative, over the top headline. I know you know this. I know you know I know this. I know you know I know tzentmyer knows this. So let's stop trifling with it. This thread has served its purpose now and needs to fade into the mists of HBD folklore.
You'll recover from this thread eventually and, using your adept, well-honed Gestopolike tactics, go onto great triumphs in other threads with many great successes in supressing thoughtful, well-intended crritques of HBD. Enjoy! See you at your 100,000th HBD post party next Wednesday.