Upon the exploration of a great man, known to the masses only as "mojolad," a new document written by the now famous prophet Caesari was unearthed. After gently dusting his screen off, eating two jello cups, and getting his nurse to change his diaper, mojolad began to transcribe the message, before sending it to FOX, where it ironically would fall on deaf ears.
This is the document mojolad found that night that caused such a stir:
I, Caesari, writing by the prodding of a divine vision, in which I saw oriole_fan, in the holy light of a new engine. On his left hand sat Norbert, and on his right there was the fear inducing JConte, kneeling, the weight of 2.0 on his shoulders. It came to the brink of crushing him, and I debated kicking his legs out from under him so it would do just that. But I digress.
On the eve of November, in the year of our code 2013, while children were out scaring each other, I saw the most frightening thing of all. I saw before me the souls of snake_p and grindi, rejoicing, frolicking in a field of clovers and altogether having a wonderful time. Their nannies sat off on a hill overlooking the meadow, holding the crayons and playthings the two held so dear. They approached me, and I stood before them, astounded.
"AWAKE, AWAKE!" Snake called, before three more spirits appeared. They looked exactly like him, and they all echoed his warning. I tried to flee, but could not.
"DOTH THOU DAREST TO ESCAPE?" Grindi said in an impenetrable way. "I ONCE WON A COMPETITION WHERE I BEAT DAVY CROCKETT AND ANNIE OAKLEY IN A SHOOTING CONTEST, BUT THEY USED REAL GUNS, MIND YOU. I ONLY HAD A BLOWGUN, AND THOSE SUCKERS ARE HARD TO SHOOT ACCURATELY FROM 350 YARDS AWAY IN THE MIDDLE OF A SNOW STORM. BUT BY GOLLY I DID IT."
I was unsure how to respond, and frankly unsure what this vision meant.
"ALTHOUGH I FLED WHEN JCONTE NUKED THE ENGINE," Snake continued, "I FORSEE AN OUTCOME- UNAVOIDABLE YET. EITHER, AND I DO MEAN THIS, 3.0 WILL BE A SUCCESS, OR
IT SHALL FAIL."
The words chilled my bones. I awoke from the vision/dream with a start, took about 4 Prozacs, and wrote my warning to you all:
3.0 is the beginning of the end, and the end of the beginning. We face the twilight years of GD, and also the golden years. I know not which shall come, but I'm banking on the fact that my Ithaca team finally wins a damn NC.