The following is paraphrased and plagiarized from a letter in my local paper:
My posts are so great! I post fabulous stuff. If you read all my posts, you will agree. Others contributors are weak, soft and out of touch. I'm not like that and I'm sure if you are reading this, you aren't either. This forum really needs great things posted and I am awesome at posting stuff. Others who post might attack me, but then they go away. They don't have what it takes to keep submitting great stuff. I have what it takes to post the best stuff and anyone who disagrees needs to be punched in the face and run out of town. I guarantee this posting will be picked as the "post of the month". If it isn't picked it will prove that this posting contest is rigged - or that maybe there is no "post of the month" contest - which there should be!