I admire your misplaced sense of optimism, sir. And how many division titles have you won? Oh, wait--that would be zee-row. And what is your best record in all 8 seasons you've been learning this complicated game at the feet of your divisional master? Right--83-79. And your lifetime record against The Escargo Embargo? 10-20. I'm beginning to understand how certain pharmaceutical companies rack up such large profits.
So now yo have a big wad of cash to overspend on free agency. I don't suppose you would care to bet a free season of HBD on the AL North division title, would you?