Season 2 - Episode 16: Chef’s Special
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to Sir LeBron who is riding a beautiful white stallion down the streets of King’s Landing. Behind him, Sir Anthony of Brow rides up to his side.

Sir Anthony: “That over there is the Bearded Knight of House Morey. They say he almost single handedly defeated his Grace in the SAVAGE WAR.”

Cut to Sir Stephen the water dancer who is training Sir Kemp.

Sir Stephen pulls a chef hat out of his scabbard and puts it on: “I have to go and make Lord dBKC his birthday cake.”

Sir Kemp: “But Sir, wasn’t his birthday yesterday?”

Sir Stephen sighs and gives Sir Kemp an exasperated look: “Every day is his motherf*cking birthday.”

Cut to the trial of bds9992. Lord robusk is addressing the crowd.

Lord robusk: “We will follow the rules of the seven gods of the SIM.” The camera pans over to Lord cmcafeeky as Lord robusk says the word, “Chaos.”

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 16: Chef’s Special

Scene opens to a wide shot of King’s Landing. We see the main courtyard in the middle of our screen. Beyond that is the ornate Sept of Baylor the Bricklayer and beyond that the splendid castle at the heart of the Red Keep. We zoom in on a street leading up to the castle. There are rows of wealthy shops up and down the road. Merchants and townspeople are in jovial moods and are out and about spending their coins. As our camera follows along the road, we suddenly take a sharp turn down a dark alley. Another darker alley crosses with this one and we find ourselves at the very end where a small establishment has set up shop. Above the door we see the word ‘Brothel’ and we enter. Inside there are a number of women on the main floor who, along with Sir Rodman, are all dressed in sultry apparel. They are all listening to Dame the Bard sing by the fireplace.

“Now back to the story of bds,
He’s rotting in a jail.
Lord pexetera’s men, the Wolves of the North,
Refused to grant him bail.”

We hear noises coming from the doors leading away from the main room and we open one and enter. Inside we see Sir Harden, the Bearded Knight, along with Sir Mutombo and Sir Wall. Lord cmcafeeky is also there. With them is a beautiful woman. They are all drinking wine.

Lord cmcafeeky: “I told you she was the most beautiful lady in the realm.”

Sir Harden: “My Lord, I’m not sure I feel comfortable having a go at your sister.”

Lord cmcafeeky: “It’s fine. Trust me, she’s the best in King’s Landing. I would know.”

The knights all look up at him with equal parts horror and fascination. There are audible gasps.

Lord cmcafeeky: “Hey man, she’s hot.”

Sir Mutombo shakes his finger at him: “No, no, no.”

Sir Wall: “Wait, she’s your sister?”

Lord cmcafeeky puffs out his chest and stands to his full height.

“A beautiful madam, regardless of one’s relation, is a site to behold.

I’m going to quote one of my favorite manuscript writers, the great Archmaester Ranty McRant, who said ‘Follow your sword, even if it leads you to grassless fields or familiar stations.’ Although in mine case, it would be more like a dagger. Ask my wife, who will then tell you that she could at least feel a real dagger.

When it comes to honor I have none. Ask my wife. When I am honor, she asks me to get off her.

But what little honor I do have is defended by a pack of Wildcats. We have destroyed the pack of sapphire devils sent from the Duke of Carolina many a time. And every time I watched mine wildcats conquer the foe, mine dagger would grow sharper.

And what is a dagger with no sheath? If a fair maiden is present, who cares which house she belongs to? If I want to visit her at her place, I shall. It’s just a short walk to the kitchen.

All roses have thorns.

And I have been covered with pedals.

But yes, to answer your question, she is my sister.”

The three knights look at each other, confused.

Sir Harden: “What? Did you guys understand any of that?”

Sir Mutombo shakes his finger in front of his face. “No, no, no.”

Sir Wall: “I guess you are from Kentucky. When I studied at the academy there, incest was common practice.”

Sir Harden: “Did you go to the Kentucky Academy too My Lord? No wonder no one can understand anything you write or say.”

Lord cmcafeeky: “Sir Harden, why do you hate me so? I drafted all your friends from the Savage War. And now I set you up with my hot sister.”

Sir Harden: “You may have taken all the same knights, but you don’t know how to use us like Lord dBKC did. You completely ignore the fighting statistics, and you never let me cook. I miss baking birthday cakes everyday.”

Lord cmcafeeky puffs out his chest once more.

“Fighting statistics?
does Sir Curry measure the circumference of the arc before striking?
did Kentucky’s greatest warrior - Sir Sanders (Colonel, not Bernie - hate that guy) do any word problems before conquering the culinary world? No. And he served up more buckets than anybody. King Kinoa included.
did Sir Lancealot calculate how many times he needed to use his lance? No. He just knew he needed to use his Lance a lot.
did my wife measure the size of my dagger before deciding that I was no threat?
Don’t answer that.

spirit - valor - courage...

pssst...we hear we lack those from the town crier and from the horseback scouts as well...but never from the jester. Take that for what you will.

Do you think Lord Calipari cares about arithmetic and such? His knights can barely do simple maths themselves.
If numbers mattered, the dang knights would have to take a math class. We don’t do math class in Kentucky do we Sir Wall?”

Sir Wall: “No, My Lord. I always had a serving girl do my math for me.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister: “But aren’t numbers important in that tournament y’all are a part of?”

Lord cmcafeeky: “Quiet wench. If I had wanted you to open your mouth, I would have paid for that.”

Sir Harden: “You’re missing my point, My Lord. All I want to do is cook. Why won’t you let me cook for you? Lord dBKC had me cook him a motherf*cking birthday cake every single day.”

Lord cmcafeeky: “I didn’t draft you to cook. The kitchen is not for men. I drafted you to fight. I drafted you, because you led Lord dBKC to a second place finish in the Savage War. Why are you not fighting as well for me?”

Sir Harden: “Maybe if you let me cook once in a while, my mind wouldn’t be so distracted while I’m on the battlefield. I always get so tense in big moments during the fights, I need a way to relax and relieve some of that tension.”

Lord cmcafeeky: “Why do you think I brought you my sister?”

Sir Harden: “I mean, I always enjoy a good brothel, but it’s just not the same. I need a place to try my new recipes. I need a place to cook.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister: “I can show you to the kitchen here Sir? I would love to try one of your signature cream filled pastries.”

Sir Harden: “You have a kitchen here? By all means, lead the way.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister takes Sir Harden by the hand and leads him out of the room.

Sir Wall: “Do you have any other hot sisters?”

Lord cmcafeeky: “Well, I married my other sister, but she isn’t nearly as hot. I better go check on Sir Harden. I don’t like it when my knights participate in womanly chores.”

Lord cmcafeeky gets up and follows his sister and Sir Harden out of the room. Sir Wall turns to Sir Dikembe. “Well, as long as we are here, shall we see if any other girls are available?”

Sir Dikembe starts to nod his head. “Yes, yes, yes.”

We cut to Lord cmcafeeky walking down the stairwell to the kitchen. As he nears the door, we hear loud grunting sounds. He pushes the door open with both hands and stumbles into the room. Inside, Sir Harden is alone and is expertly crafting a pie crust.

Lord cmcafeeky: “Where is my lady sister?”

Sir Harden: “She left once she realized that I actually just wanted to cook. I think she had other ideas.”

Lord cmcafeeky: “What did I tell you about cooking? This is not suitable for a knight of my house. What will Lord amerk think? I forbid you from cooking anymore!”

Sir Harden’s eyes narrow. His hand inches towards a meat cleaver on the countertop. “You forbid me from cooking?”

Lord cmcafeeky: “Yes. I forbid it. You should be on the practice courtyard working on your swordsmanship.”

Sir Harden’s fingers close upon the handle of the meat cleaver.

We cut to the main floor of the brothel where along with Sir Rodman, the ladies of the establishment are still curled by the fireplace, listening to Dame the Bard.

“So begins the trial of bds,
The whole realm held its breath.
He demanded to live or die by the sword,
Trial by combat to the death.”

The door from the kitchen opens and Sir Harden brings out the largest pie any of them have ever seen. He has a broad grin stretched across his face that we can almost see from under his beard.

Sir Harden: “Ladies! Who wants to try my special pie?”

He starts passing out slices to each of the women. We hear brief comments from them about the pie.

“This is delicious!”

“Wow! What flavor!”

“Amazing!”

One of the women looks right at Sir Harden. “Why do you call this your special pie?”

Sir Harden: “Why, because it is made with an extra special ingredient, of course!”

“And what’s that?”

Sir Harden winks mischievously at her. “The best chefs never tell my dear, but I think I will be cooking a lot more from now on.”

The camera zooms in on the slice of pie she is eating. Inside the filling we can just make out the outline of a finger. Our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES

Season 2 - Episode 17: Spaghetti and Meatballs
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to a tavern where Sir Paul the Truthfulness, Sir Penny the Frail, and Sir Drummond the Wide are sharing a pint with Sir Clyde and Sir Kyrie of House ashamael.

Sir Paul: “It all started during the knight selection process. There were some delays since Lord albiband, the Spaghetti Knight, had to send his selections via carrier pigeon from Essos. A couple lords got frustrated by this, but none more so than Lord amerk. He went on this long rant about how the Spaghetti Lord was wasting his time, how he had better things to do such as watch the maidens play golf. It was quite the spectacle. Lords at each other's throats. But then, it happened.”

Sir Clyde: “What happened?!”

Sir Paul: “It was the Spaghetti Lord’s turn and after waiting all night, a carrier pigeon flew into the Red Keep, but on it’s way there it took a **** right on Lord amerk’s head.”

Sir Clyde: “OH NO!”

Sir Paul: “Lord amerk cried out for vengeance. He sent a raven that night to Essos, challenging the Spaghetti Lord to a duel.”

Sir Clyde: “And? Who won the duel?”

Sir Paul: “Lord amerk is still waiting in the practice courtyard. He has said he will not leave until he has been avenged.”

Cut to the practice courtyard where we see Lord amerk standing by himself. A carrier pigeon flies by and drops a letter down at his feet. He bends down to pick it up, opens it, and reads it out loud.

“I will be arriving in Westeros soon and look forward to competing against you all. Good luck to everyone!”

Lord amerk looks up from the letter with an outraged grimace. We hear a ‘Splat!’ as our screen goes white. The next thing we see is Lord amerk covered in pigeon ****. He lets loose a guttural scream into the sky as our screen goes black. The last thing we hear is Lord amerk's cry, “SPAGHETTIIIII!!!!!”

We see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 17: Spaghetti and Meatballs

Scene opens to the Festival of the Red Hats. It is being held in a large colosseum like arena. The arena seems empty upon first glance, but as we zoom closer we notice about a dozen people near the center who are surrounding a small stage. Among the delirious shouting and cheering, we see Lord amerk who is shot gunning some ale and wearing a red hat. On the stage in front, the leader of the festival is struggling to drink a glass of water. We zoom in on Lord amerk. Next to him, Lord cmcafeeky is there, but something is wrong with him. He is expressionless and unmoving. Lord amerk looks confused, but is then distracted by a commotion up front. We follow his gaze and see that the leader has turned into a giant meatball. More than that, everyone around Lord amerk is turning into meatballs. Lord amerk starts to panic and run away, but after one step he realizes that his legs are no longer there. Instead he is turning into a round ball of meat. He starts to roll away and we see that he is now a large meatball with eyes and a mouth. He is still wearing his red hat which stays on top of him no matter how he rolls. The sky turns black and from high above, giant thick noodles emerge from all sides of the arena. They start to attack the meatballs, wrap around them, and pull them from the stadium. Lord amerk tries to roll away. He passes Lord cmcafeeky who is battling with a dozen noodles. They engulf him and turn him into a spaghetti pie. Lord amerk has almost escaped the arena, when a particularly massive noodle shoots out from the above opening to the arena. It wraps around Lord amerk and jerks him into the sky. Lord amerk wails as he is thrown over the edge of the arena. He vaults towards a colossal heap of spaghetti noodles waiting to devour him. We zoom in on Lord amerk’s face. His mouth is open wide, his eyes narrowed, sword gripped tight in his hands, and we hear him emit his final battle cry. “SPAGHETTIIIII!!!!!”

“My Lord, My Lord. Wake up, wake up!”

Lord amerk wakes up to a sunny morning on the practice courtyard. Standing over him is Sir Penny who is holding a sword on one hand and Lil’ Penny on the other. Lord amerk sits up and glances around. We hear the clang of steel and see that Sir Karl the Sitemail Man and Sir Charles of the Round Mound are still locked in endless battle. Near them, Sir Kawhi’s lifeless form is still powered down.

Sir Penny: “My Lord! He has finally arrived! He’s here!”

Lil’ Penny: “Now maybe you can finally get off your *** and coach us. You haven’t left this spot for weeks apart from that brief court appearance. How come you don’t coach your team and you’re always worried about Mr. Bucca Di Beppo? Maybe you’d start caring about me if I changed my name to Lil Penne.”

Sir Penny: “Hush Lil’ Penny. My Lord, he has finally arrived!”

Lord amerk: “Who? Who is here?”

Lil’ Penny: “Who do you think? The only one who makes your plot relevant at all.”

Sir Penny: “The Spaghetti Lord has finally arrived from Essos. His ship is just pulling in. We need to get you ready for battle!”

Lord amerk’s eyes narrow. “Spaghetti!!”

Cut to the shipyard where a great barge has just pulled in. Walking down the docks to the shore is the Spaghetti Lord himself, Lord albiband. He is dressed to the nines in a green designer cloak over white linens and is wearing bright red leather pants. He has a slim gold chain necklace around his neck. Waiting for him at the end of the docks are Sir Stockton and Sir Towns, both of whom look giddy with anticipation. Lord albiband approaches and kisses each knight twice, once on each cheek.

Sir Stockton: “My Lord, it is so wonderful of you to finally arrive. We have not been doing so well without a lord on the sidelines to guide us.”

Sir Towns: “Did you have a nice journey, My Lord?”

There is an awkward silence as the two knights wait for Lord albiband to respond. When no response comes, they continue talking.

Sir Stockton: “We are currently in last place, but now that you are here we are sure to rise in the standings. We might even be able to catch Lord amerk. You still haven’t selected our last three knights either. All of the other armies have made their selections. Once we have a full roster, we are sure to win some fights. Who are you planning on selecting?”

Lord albiband: “...”

Sir Towns: “Lord amerk has been waiting for you to arrive. He has been telling anyone who will listen that you are a dead man and only delaying your arrival because you know you will lose. But we know better.”

Sir Stockton: “We need to get you into your armor and head over there now actually. I don’t think Lord amerk will wait much longer. We should also figure out the rest of our army.”

Lord albiband starts waving his hands in exaggerated gestures. “The journey was pleasant, grazi.”

The two knights look at each other, concerned.

Sir Stockton: “My Lord, are you alright?”

Sir Towns: “Oh look, up ahead is Sir Grant of the Hill. He is to lead us to the courtyard. He was a mighty warrior in his day who looked to be a future champion. That is, if not for his Achilles Heel.”

Sir Stockton: “And what was that again, I forget?”

Sir Towns: “I told you, his Achilles Heel.”

Lord albiband: “I am quite alright, grazi. Yes, let’s go to the courtyard. My fight with destiny awaits.”

Cut to the practice courtyard where spectators have packed the stands. Waiting at midcourt is Lord amerk who is fully armored apart from his helm which he holds under one arm. On the other arm hangs a well-dressed woman with a sour look on her face. The pair watch as Lord albiband rides up to the courtyard. We zoom in on Lord albiband and his party of knights. Lord albiband dismounts and grabs for a flagon of wine.

Sir Stockton: “How was your horse ride, sir?”

Sir Towns: “You shouldn’t drink before a fight My Lord.”

Sir Stockton: “My Lord, that looks like very light armor, are you sure you don’t want to wear something a bit heavier?”

Lord albiband continues to drink and doesn’t bother responding to either.

Sir Towns: “The wine could get you killed, My Lord.”

Sir Stockton: “My Lord, at least wear a helmet.”

Lord albiband puts down the wine glass. “The horse ride was fine.” He steps forth and towards mid-court.

We zoom back in on Lord amerk and the woman at his side. Lord amerk is craning his neck and looking into the stands. “Where is your lord husband? I named him my second and now he doesn’t show up for the fight? It is most unlike him not to show up for a confrontation of any kind. Have you seen him?”

The woman next to Lord amerk scowls. “My lord husband does not often grace me with his presence. He is too often meandering around with his other sister to pay attention to me.”

Lord amerk: “It makes no matter. Lord cmcafeeky or not, the Spaghetti Lord has eaten his last meal.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s wife kisses Lord amerk deeply. “Do not leave me alone in this world. I cannot go back to my lord husband’s bed.”

Lord amerk grabs his sword and approaches Lord albiband. “You have made me wait for the last time Spaghetti Lord. Draw your steel and let’s cook. How do you like your pasta done?”

Lord albiband: “...”

Lord amerk: “WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS DELAYING YOUR ANSWERS?!? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

Lord albiband: “…”

Lord amerk: “LISTEN HERE YOU FOREIGN F*CK, WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?”

Up in the stands, several lords from the crowd chime in.

Lord dBKC: “Hey, that’s uncalled for. You don’t need to bring swear words to a fight to the death.”

Lord ashamael: “Yes, chill out lord Amerk”

Lord brad of the Longest and Tallest House yawns deeply. Lord Gerry the Red closes his eyes and covers his ears.

Lord Amerk: “AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES THIS MADNESS?!? IT WAS A SIMPLE QUESTION AND HE HAS NO RESPONSE WHATSOEVER. THIS IS UNCALLED FOR!”

Lord albiband: “…”

Lord Amerk starts kicking the barrels that are in the arena and throws his dagger on the ground. “IT IS BUT A SIMPLE QUESTION. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?! DO THE REST OF YOU NOT SEE THIS RIDICULOUSNESS?!?” He takes his helmet off and punts it into the stands. “I KNOW HE SPEAKS THE COMMON TONGUE...THIS IS LUNACY!”

Lord albiband: “…”

Lord amerk starts walking up the stairs of the arena and is now in the stands. He grabs lord ashamael’s head and turns it towards Lord albiband, who is still standing speechless in the arena, sword still sheathed. Lord amerk points at Lord albiband and asks Lord ashamael, “DO YOU NOT THINK THIS IS RIDICULOUS?!?”

Lord ashamael removes the hand of Lord amerk from his face with a distasteful look. “Have some empathy for once in your miserable life. And don’t presume to touch me again.”

Lord amerk feigns mock horror: “OH I'M SORRY! Did I offend one of the KOOL KIDS?! If it had been Lord jhsukow or Lord robusk who was upset with these delays, everyone would be fine with it. If Lord dh555 or Lord benhoidal, wherever they are, had condemned the Spaghetti Knight, he would have been banished back home to whichever barren land he claims to be from. But no, since it is I, Lord albiband gets to stay here in my great country and gets a participation trophy despite coming in last place. I’M SICK OF IT! I’m just going to crawl back to my hole until the end of this forsaken tournament.” He turns to look at Lord ashamael. “I hope you will save some of your so called empathy for me when I delay the final tilts by not showing up!”

Lord amerk continues up the arena steps and leaves the viewing area, now ranting to the concession vendors. Lord cmcafeeky’s sister wife hikes up her dress and follows him out.

The camera cuts back to the sideline of the courtyard where Sir Stockton, Sir Towns, and Sir Penny are standing flabbergasted.

Sir Stockton: “What did he mean, crawl back into his hole?”

Lil’ Penny: “He meant his *sshole!”

Sir Penny: “Hush, Lil’ Penny. No, Lord amerk dug a giant hole just outside of his keep that he has been living in for quite some time. Nobody knows why.”

Lil’ Penny: “Dug his own grave more like!”

Sir Karl points at Lord albiband who is still standing motionless in the middle of the courtyard, sword still sheathed. He sighs. “I guess we will always be in last place. I had such high hopes for this Lord’s arrival. It seems I will never have a capable lord on the sidelines to help mold my talent.”

The crowd begins to disperse and soon the practice courtyard is empty aside from Lord albiband, who is still standing motionless at mid-court. The camera zooms in on the Spaghetti Lord. His face turns slowly towards the camera. He unsheathes his dagger, holds it out in front of him, and says, “I like my pasta… al dente.

Our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES

Season 2 - Episode 18: The Doctor Is In
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to a great feast where two lords lay choking on the ground. Somebody yells to get a medic, and jcred5 hurries off quickly, exclaiming: “I’ll go get Dr. J.”

Cut to the practice courtyard where Sir Giannis is standing over a wounded Sir Kareem.

Sir Kareem: “I saved your lord’s life at the feast. Please show mercy!”

Sir Giannis slams his shield down on top of the fallen knight.

Cut to Sir Kareem being taken off the courtyard on a gurney being pulled by Dr. J.

Cut to the Hand of the King, Lord dh555 who is sitting behind his desk and addressing his knights. “We need to stop them. Whatever means necessary. If we can’t beat them during the tournament, we need to attack at night, target their key fighters, make them incapable of participating.”

Cut to a hooded man in the back of a dark tavern who is holding a vial of a dark liquid. “Put two drops of this into Sir Giannis’s drink the next time you see him. One sip and Sir Giannis will never think of leaving again.”

Sir Conley takes the vial and stands up. “Oh thank you kind sir. We shall depart to see Sir Giannis right away.”

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 18: The Doctor Is In

Scene opens to a wide shot of the streets of King’s Landing. People are streaming out of homes and shops and making their way towards the main courtyard. Everyone is in a jovial mood. Street vendors are selling autographed swords and helmets along with various custom made chain-mail armor with the names of different knights engraved on the back. Up ahead looms the great arena, the massive fighting courtyard where all the battles are held. As our camera follows along the road, we suddenly take a sharp turn down a narrow street that is empty of people. The stores on this street are all boarded up. Off to the side, we see a large pothole that seems to have been dug out recently. As the camera moves up the street, we see Lord amerk curled up in the hole. At the very end of the street, a gigantic tent has been set up. A flap is pulled back and we enter.

Inside, row upon row of straw beds filled with injured knights greet our camera. Calmly gliding from bed to bed, we see the unmistakable Afro that can only belong to the best medic the Savage Lands have ever known: Dr. J.

Dr. J is walking towards the beds near the front of the tent. He is carrying a tray with a set of clean bandages and ice packs. There are also two frothy mugs, one with a green liquid inside and the other with a dark cloudy beverage. He passes a bed where Dame the Bard is lying down with a splint on his finger and a cast over his right knee. He is holding his violin in his hands and singing a song for all to hear.

“Lords gathered round and swords were drawn,
To see who would have the first pick.
When the sword that was drawn was for bds,
Sir LeBron got a little sick.”

Dr. J approaches one of the straw beds near the front of the tent and we see Sir Kareem who has both legs held up in the air by straps and is covered in bloody bandages. On the bed next to him, Sir Giannis is retching into a bucket.

Sir Kareem: “Serves you right for how you treated me. What were you playing at? And even after I saved your lord's life.”

Sir Giannis throws up into his bucket without responding.

Dr. J starts to unwrap Sir Kareem’s bloody bandages and replaces them with fresh ones.

Dr. J: “At least you got to fight in the tournament. With all of the injuries happening to all the knights, the Lord Hand won’t let me participate. Just because I have a medical degree I have to stay here all day and night and don’t even get to fight. My Lord, jcred5, didn’t draft me in the first round for me to sit here all day away from the action. No wonder he is doing so poorly in the tilts. He is too good an owner to be in the bottom six otherwise. Although he did seem to be more worried about getting his picks in quickly than actually selecting the best knights. No wonder why they all ended up in here.”

Dr. J points down a row of straw beds and we see Sir Rondo, the Turtle Knight, Sir Blake, the Griffin Knight, Sir Mark Jackson the Smug for No Reason, Sir Ibaka, the Rejecter, and Sir Wallace of the Afro Knights.

Sir Kareem points to Sir Ibaka and Sir Wallace. “What did you expect when your lord drafted those two to back you up? Your squad needed more offense and they’ve never gone on the attack in their lives.”

Dr. J: “Lord jcred5 is always saying that the best offense is a good defense.”

Sir Kareem: “Judging by your record, apparently not.”

Dr. J: “Well maybe we would be doing better if he had selected Sir Kerr instead of Sir Mark Jackson.”

Sir Rondo pipes up from his sickbed: “It’s because Lord jcred5 is playing checkers when other teams are playing vertical checkers.”

Sir Blake looks confused next to him. “Vertical checkers?”

Sir Rondo: “Yes, it’s this new game where you have to connect four of your checkers in a row. I’m very good. I defeat the children all the time.”

Sir Blake: “Hey, I have a new joke for you. What’s the difference between bds9992 and a tree?”

Sir Rondo: “...”

Sir Blake: “A tree has more rings!”

Sir Rondo: “...”

Sir Blake: “What? It’s funny!”

Sir Rondo: “You’ve already used that one on me. Plus, bds9992 is in third place and has a very good chance at winning one of the five tournaments. Hasn’t he been the butt of enough jokes lately? I think it’s time to give him some credit.”

Sir Blake: “Okay, how about this one? Why do they call him Lord jcred5 anyways? Are there four other jcreds running around? One for each tournament?”

Sir Rondo: “Don’t quit your day job Sir Blake. I swear, ever since you tried that jump attack over the carriage and hit your head, none of your jokes have been funny.”

Sir Blake dejectedly hangs his head.

Dr. J points over to a set of straw beds on the other side of the tent. “Well at least our team isn’t doing as poorly as theirs.”

Our camera pans over and we see Sir Stockton and Sir Towns of House albiband. Next to them we see knights from the lords, jpevans31, ysw128, jhsukow, and goetz93.

Dr. J: “None of their lords have any hope of winning the tournament and ascending the throne.”

Sir Blake points to a heap of bodies lying on the ground at the back of the tent. “And what about them? Why don’t they get beds?”

Dr. J: “Oh those are Lord tarheel’s knights. They are dead. Slayed by Sir Michael of Jordan for not practicing hard enough. I think it is just Sir Michael and Sir Melo on that team now. Somehow, Lord tarheel is still in the middle of the pack. Now that you are out for the season, Sir Kareem, your lord has little chance of finishing as high.”

Sir Kareem points at Sir Giannis. “That’s because of this Freak!”

Sir Giannis promptly pukes into his bucket.

Dr. J sighs: “I just wish I could be out there fighting. It would make all the difference for my lord, I know it! After all, I did take third in the Savage War fighting for Lord benhoidal. But, he isn’t doing as well this time either. It’s because he doesn’t have me by his side fighting for him again.”

Sir Kareem: “Do you still talk with Lord benhoidal? Word is that he has shut himself off from watching the fights and has been holed up inside his tent. He’s up to something in there. I’m sure of it.”

Dr. J: “Actually I saw him just this morning. In fact it was him who brewed these potions and told me to give one of them to Sir Giannis to heal his sickness.”

He hands one of the mugs filled with the green beverage to Sir Giannis who removes his head from his bucket and swallows the potion rapidly.

Just then, the front tent flap swings open and a gurney is led into the tent. Dr. J quickly gets up and rushes towards the sick man. We see that it is Sir Kyrie of House ashamael.

Dr. J: “Another knight who wasn’t even involved in this afternoon’s tilts. That makes six just today. Is there no place safe in this cursed city?” Dr. J looks over Sir Kyrie quickly. “Wow. I’ve never seen so many injuries for one knight. What happened?”

Sir Kyrie: “I was attacked! I was walking with Sir JaVale to the arena for our fight this afternoon and we were set upon by brigands! They wore the armor of knights, but their visors were down and we couldn’t see their faces. I told Sir JaVale to go get help, but he ran the wrong way. It was one on five, just the way I like it, but they proved to be too much. After they beat me bloody, they ran away, but not before I saw it.”

Dr. J: “Saw what?”

Sir Kyrie: “Resting on the shoulders of one of the knights was a great snake, a black mamba. It was Sir Kobe! They were the Hand’s men, they’ve been attacking everyone. It’s a conspiracy straight from the top!”

A hush falls over the sick bay. Sir Kareem and Dr. J share a tension filled glance. Then, all at once, everyone in the tent begins to laugh in unison.

Dr. J: “Oh Sir Kyrie! You and your crazy theories always crack me up. Remember when you claimed that dragons were real? Or when you thought you saw a velociraptor, but it turned out to just be my teammate, Sir Bosh?”

Sir Kyrie: “There really was a dragon! I saved the princess!”

Dr. J chuckles and grabs the second potion from his tray. “I’m sure you did. Here, take this. It was made specially for you. Everything will feel better tomorrow.”

Sir Kyrie takes the potion and tilts it towards his mouth. Our camera zooms in on the dark cloudy substance until it is all we see. White block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Episode 19: La Calma Prima Della Tempesta
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to the great council chamber where the lords of the realm are waiting for dh555’s decision.

Lord dh555: “It has been decided. With no heirs to the throne the only fair way to decide the succession is to hold a great tourney.”

A loud murmur goes through the chamber.

Lord dh555: “All of the lords assembled here today shall compete for the throne.”

Cut to a great feast where Lord dh555 is again addressing the Lords of the realm.

Lord dh555: “Lords, this tournament shall be like none other this realm has ever known. Preliminary rounds shall last six weeks. Then, we shall have five great final tournaments held, with the winners sparring off until only one remains. Whoever amongst you shall reign victorious shall be named the next King of the SAVAGE LANDS.”

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 19: La Calma Prima Della Tempesta

Scene opens to the great fighting courtyard where all the fights are held. Crowds are filling into the arena in droves and we follow them in and into the stands. On the sidelines at mid-court, a large box has been set up. Inside we see the Hand of the King, Lord dh555, along with the rest of the lords that have made the final tilts in at least one of the five tournaments. Our camera focuses on each of the lords in turn. In the front row, Lord pexetera is looking smug sitting atop a finely crafted stone throne, he carved himself. Next to him, Lord dBKC is scarfing down birthday cake. To his left, bds9992 is extremely anxious and mentally going through a series of ii-V’s descending in whole-steps to calm himself down. In the middle of the front row, Lord dh555 is getting ready to make a speech. Lord mptrey is walking down the aisle to his empty seat, apologizing to everyone as he goes past. Lord ashamael is wearing a white cloak over what looks to be red robes underneath. At the end of the row sits Lord 24kpyrite whose bald head is covered in glitter. He reeks of scented oils and is asking Lord ashamael if he has any more single gold coins. In the next row back, Lord Gerry the Red is covering his eyes with one hand as his other hand tries to plug his ears. Next to him, Lord pharrop is absentmindedly patting the head of Lord Brad of the Longest and Tallest House whose head is resting on Lord pharrop’s shoulder deep in sleep. There is an empty chair to the left of them and we zoom in quickly to see a name tag for Lord benhoidal. To the left, Lord tarheel is looking from the empty chair on his right to the one on his left in confusion. We see that the next chair was meant for Lord cmcafeeky. Lord robusk sits next to the empty chair and is furiously calculating something on his abacus. In the back row on the far left is another empty chair, this one with a name tag for Lord 20ks. Next to it sits Lord mikee, first of his name who is trying to get Lord dskantor to make increasingly complicated side bets with him on the fights. There is another empty chair with a name tag for Lord amerk and to the left of that is Lord jcred5 who is getting ready to time Lord dh555’s speech. Lord goetz93 sits next to him and is furiously taking notes on the other Lords. At the very end of the row, Lord jhsukow has out a sketchpad. We zoom in on it and see he is drawing a cartoon with caricatures of the other Lords.

There are two smaller boxes next to the main one, one on either side. We swing to the box on the left where we see the lords that failed to make the final tilts: Lords albiband, jpevans31, and ysw128. Lord ysw128 seems to have gone mad, muttering, “If only I could find my shift key. I seem to have lost my shift key. Where is my shift key?”. Lord jpevans31 is talking to Lord albiband who is only half paying attention as his full concentration is fixated on the Cyvasse board in between them.

Lord jpevans31: “I don’t know what happened. Lord albiband, you weren’t here during the Savage War. Did you know I placed in the top third of all lords? I took eighth place. I was ahead of Lords robusk and ashamael and everything. I didn’t expect to win this tournament or anything, but I certainly didn’t think I would end up twenty-third, only ahead of you. I guess that’s what happens when your top knight is more interested in wearing dresses and going to balls than in fighting. Say, Lord albiband, did you ever resolve your duel with Lord amerk?”

Lord albiband moves his trebuchet across the board to capture a crossbowman. “No. Che Importa?”

Lord jpevans31 moves a spearman forward. “Shame, I would have loved to see that fight. Lord amerk certainly didn’t make many friends during the selection process, but I actually agreed with him on most of his points. You really do need to learn how to send proxy pigeons. Say, did you hear there might be another Savage War after this one?”

Lord albiband moves one of his catapults to the side, which frees up his elephant. “No. Non crede che gli stranieri dovrebbero partecipare a questo torneo.”

Lord jpevans31 looks confused at both what Lord albiband is saying and at the Cyvasse board. He moves his dragon diagonally away from his king to capture the catapult. “Well it looks like Lord pexetera will probably win the tournament and become King. I heard some rumblings that the ‘Kool Kids’ as Lord amerk likes to call them, might not be okay with this and may try to unseat him with one of their own. Lord dBKC is probably their best shot. If Lord pexetera does win, look for there to be another war and lords will have to choose sides. I haven’t decided yet, I may side with Lords dBKC, ashamael, jhsukow and robusk because they seem more fun to party with. If only Lord benhoidal wasn’t a part of their group. Do you know which side you will choose to be on?”

Lord albiband, moves his elephant forward to block the dragon which frees up his own dragon. “No. Ci saranno più xenofobi?”

Lord jpevans31 moves his dragon away to capture the elephant. “On the other hand, sometimes they just get drunk and make fun of the court jester. Maybe it’s time for some new leadership. I hope you decide to join us wherever we go although you will have to get better at strategy. You should never leave your elephant unprotected. Would you like me to teach you some basic moves?”

Lord albiband moves his own dragon across the board and diagonal from Lord jpevans31’s King. “Sono il mio uomo. Combatto per la giustizia. A proposito, perdi.”

Lord jpevans31 frowns at the board. “I guess you are better at Cyvasse than you are at selecting knights. He then turns to talk to Lord ysw128. “Well at least now that we are out of the tournament, we have more time to frequent brothels.”

The camera lingers on Lord albiband and we hear him say, “Non ho bisogno di aiuto strategico. Aspetta solo la prossima guerra. Vi inchinerete tutti al signore degli spaghetti.”

We cut to the right of the main box, where we see the highborn ladies of the realm. Sir Rodman is also there, wearing his best dress. There are two empty seats next to him. Two highborn ladies enter the box and go to sit down next to Sir Rodman in the empty chairs. One is quite good looking, the other is not. The good looking one is looking around frantically at the other two boxes.

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister/lover: “Where could he be? I haven’t seen him since that day at the brothel. It isn’t like him to stay away from my bed this long.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister/wife: “Who cares? Our brother has never been anything but a red necked impotent scoundrel and I fear he may be possessed as he always speaks in tongues.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister/lover slaps her sister. “How dare you? Our brother was the one who set me up in the brothel in the first place. It’s the highest paying gig I ever had.”

Sir Rodman leans over. “I know how you feel, Madame. I’ve often felt like the best prostitute in a high-class whore house, but all the other girls get paid more than I do.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister/lover turns her nose up at Sir Rodman. “And who are you supposed to be? Why are you wearing women’s clothes?”

Sir Rodman: “I am Sir Rodman of House jpevans31 and I’ll be the judge of my own manliness.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister/lover: “Why is a knight such as yourself not in the courtyard getting ready to fight?”

Sir Rodman: “My lord has already been knocked out I’m afraid. Didn’t know how to use me. Did you know I was the leading commander at the Battle of the Raging Bulls in the first Savage War? Lord Brad of the Longest and Tallest House was supposed to be in charge, but he fell asleep just before the fighting started. Sir Wade and myself led the charge and defeated the Late King Kinoa.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sisters don’t look impressed and so Sir Rodman continues. “I wish Lord jpevans31 had surrounded me with someone like Sir Wade this time. Sir Klay just wants to practice archery all the time and Sir Zo is always taking bathroom breaks during the middle of our fights. And don’t get me started on the end of the bench! Sir Buse? Sir Crowder? Are you kidding me? And then that Green knight. I thought we were getting Sir Draymond, or at least Sir Danny. Alas, it was Sir Johnny. Doesn’t Lord jpevans31 know that I am a support knight, who needs to be surrounded by stars and not the other way around? When he selected Sir Lacey, I thought I was getting a new dress!”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sister/lover: “I guess we both wish you were down below fighting then.”

Sir Rodman: “I’m glad we got knocked out of the tourney actually. I do prefer the gown to chainmail. Much breather in the nether regions.”

Lord cmcafeeky’s sisters both give Sir Rodman a sour look and exit their seats.

We swing back to the main box, where Lord dh555 steps towards the front to address the crowd. “Ladies and Gentlemen of Westeros. Six weeks ago began the greatest tournament this realm has ever known. We have seen bloodshed, glory, and some of the best fighting in history. But, we are not done yet. The seeding rounds are over, and we have narrowed the field down. There will be five champions of these final tilts, and the one who scores highest overall shall be crowned champion and King of the Land!” He steps away for a second and grabs a purple pillow upon which rests a large ornate crown. He hoists it into the air in front of him and exclaims, “Let the playoffs begin!”

The crowd all around roars in appreciation as our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Episode 20: Hope You Guessed My Name
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to a dungeon where an unkempt bds9992 is looking from shoulder to shoulder. On his left shoulder is the image of Lord ashamael in a white cloak. On his right, we see Lord benhoidal wearing the robes of a red priest. Two short horns protrude from his forehead.

bds9992: “Aren’t you two supposed to disagree on everything?”

Lord benhoidal: “Actually, ash and I agree on almost everything.”

Lord ashamael: “No, we are very different. Just look at our different colored robes!”

Lord benhoidal reaches around bds9992’s neck and lifts the bottom of Lord ashamael’s white cloak to reveal the robes of a red priest underneath. “You just took that white cloak from one of your players, didn’t you?”

Cut to the injury tent where a hobbled Sir Kareem is talking to Dr. J.

Sir Kareem: “Do you still talk with Lord benhoidal? Word is that he has shut himself off from watching the fights and has been holed up inside his tent. He’s up to something in there. I’m sure of it.”

Cut to the Tower of the Hand, where Lord dh555 is sitting at his desk, his eyes glossed over. To his left, a shadow is shimmering in the air.

A voice from the shadows emerges. “Soon, the throne will be mine. We will destroy the other Lords of the Realm using this tournament as a ruse. I will emerge victorious and be crowned the Savage King.”

From out of the shadows, we see two pointed horns emerge. Underneath, the face of Lord benhoidal comes into view grinning wickedly from ear to ear. He tilts his head back and lets loose a maniacal laugh.

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 20: Hope You Guessed My Name

Scene opens to two knights riding horses up a winding road in King’s Landing. It is dark out, and the wind is blowing fiercely. The knights are wearing the maroon and gold armor of House benhoidal. One of them has a white cloak billowing in the wind. We see that it is Sir Anthony of Brow and Sir Bobby. On both sides of the road, they pass great tents adorned with the sigils of different lords. Up ahead at the very end of the road past all of the tents, we see a great fortress. It has been shaped from stone to look like a devil, with two high towers ending in points. Devil architecture can be seen all around the outside of the fortress such as small devils framing the main gates and others holding lit torches or three pronged pitchforks.

Sir Anthony: “Have you ever actually met our Lord?”

Sir Bobby: “No. He hasn’t been seen since the trial.”

Sir Anthony: “I’m always hearing about what a great Lord he is, yet here we are in the middle of the pack entering the playoffs, with almost no shot at winning it all.”

Sir Bobby: “I was told of his brilliance too. After fighting for King Kinoa in the Savage War, I was expecting more than this.”

Sir Anthony: “I miss fighting with Sir LeBron. Sir Artis is fine, but it is not the same. And then there’s the Boogie Knight. How are we supposed to fight when he demands to be the only one with a sword? Why did Lord benhoidal select Sir Cousins anyways? Everybody knows that if you try to coach him, he will just sabotage your whole team.”

Sir Bobby: “If we don’t win the tournament, do you think I will have to give up my white cloak? I was so excited after Lord benhoidal drafted me. I thought I would get to keep it.”

Sir Anthony: “Don’t you think it is a bit strange that he hasn’t attended a single one of our fights?”

Sir Bobby: “I’m sure he has been busy.”

Sir Anthony: “Busy with what? Do you think he has been casting spells that will help us win in these final tournaments?”

Sir Bobby: “Casting spells? Don’t tell me you believe all those rumors about him.”

Sir Anthony: “I hear that he’s a powerful sorcerer who can clone knights.”

Sir Bobby: “That’s just a tale, there’s no truth to it.”

Sir Anthony: “Speaking of tails, I hear that he has one, along with a forked tongue.”

Sir Bobby: “Just a rumor started by the Bastard of Bolton, slashtc.”

Sir Anthony: “I hear that sometimes he doesn’t even show up for his fights, just to enrage the other lords.”

Sir Bobby: “Not tr… well, actually, that one is true.”

Sir Anthony: “I hear that he preys on the young and survives off their blood.”

Sir Bobby: “Nonsense!”

Sir Anthony: “I hear that Lord benhoidal can turn straw into gold.”

Sir Bobby: “Well yes, but once he trades it, it turns back to straw.”

Sir Anthony: “So you don’t believe any of it then? None of the rumors?”

Sir Bobby: “I guess we will see.”

They have made it to the great front gates of the fortress, which looms high above them. They tie up their horses and approach. The gates swing open on their own accord and Sir Anthony and Sir Bobby glance at each other quickly and pause before entering. In front of them is a great hall adorned with devilish statues all around. To their left is a winding staircase formed by what looks to be a pointed tail as a bannister. The two knights head up the staircase. At the top, pale moonlight streams through a high arching window, putting a spotlight on two great red doors carved with many devilish gargoyles. From beyond them we hear faint screams and shrieks. We see horned shadows pass by on the other side. There is an old fashioned knocker in the middle of each of the two doors, shaped into a grinning devil. Lord Anthony reaches out and gives one of the doors a loud knock.

The sounds stop. A moment later, the doors swing open and there in front of us is Lord benhoidal. He is wearing the robes of a red priest, and from underneath his hood, we can just see two pointed horns protruding from his head. Lord benhoidal looks the visitors up and down with a quick glance. “What do you want?”

Lord Anthony and Lord Bobby exchange a look.

Lord Anthony: “My Lord, you called us here to your fortress.”

Lord benhoidal: “Oh yes, come on in.”

The two knights follow him inside and we see a large round room. In the middle there is a large table, about fifty feet long, painted in the shape of a detailed map of Westeros. Behind the table, we see seven statues, each carved to represent one of the seven gods of the sim. Each one has been given devilish features. Beyond them, seven high arching windows overlook the coastline. To the left of the table we see three sizable cauldrons full of potions. The largest of the cauldrons has deep green substance in it which is bubbling softly. Next to it, in a slightly smaller cauldron, is a dark, cloudy liquid that is frothing slightly over the edge. In the tiny cauldron on the end is a flat golden elixir. To the right of the table sits a grand fireplace with towering flames reaching almost to the ceiling. We pause for a moment on the fire within. Shapes start to form. Faces appear, seemingly in anguish, but we can’t quite make them out. Next to the fireplace is a maroon door with the outline of a golden devil on it. There is no handle or knocker of any kind. We hear a pounding from the inside of this door, followed by some muffled shouts.

Lord benhoidal mutters something from under his breath and the noise stops. He turns back towards the two knights.

Sir Bobby: “My Lord, what was that sou…?”

Lord benhoidal: “Never mind the closet, just something I am working on.”

Sir Anthony: “Something that will help us in the tournament?”

Lord benhoidal: “Yes, it will definitely help me.”

Sir Bobby: “But, My Lord, how do you plan on winning? Lord pexetera is too far ahead.”

Lord benhoidal: “Nonsense. I just have to win all four tournaments that I am in.”

Sir Anthony: “But, My Lord, we are only still playing in three of the five tournaments?”

Lord benhoidal: “Yes, I meant three.”

Sir Bobby: “Well, we trust you, My Lord. You have won more tournaments than any other knight.”

Upon hearing this, Lord benhoidal’s left eye starts to twitch and we see a flicker of annoyance cross his face.

Lord benhoidal: “Sir Bobby, I see you still wear the white cloak of the Kingsguard?”

Sir Bobby: “Yes, My Lord. Until there is a new king, I will wear this cloak proudly.”

Lord benhoidal narrows his eyes and turns towards the three cauldrons. We hear him mutter, “The one that got away.”

A goblet materializes out of thin air and into his hand. We see that it is filled to the brim with the green bubbly liquid from the largest of the three cauldrons. He turns back around and hands it to Sir Anthony, who crinkles his nose in disgust.

Lord benhoidal: “This is why I have called you here today. Bring this goblet to our battle with Lord ashamael on the morrow. Have all of your knights drink deeply from it.”

Lord Anthony: “But My Lord, there isn’t enough for us all!”

Lord benhoidal: “Oh, you will find that this goblet is never empty as long as it is whole. Once you have all had your fill, victory will be found at the bottom.”

Sir Bobby: “My Lord, pardon my asking, but are you sure this will work? I mean, magic isn’t real.”

Lord benhoidal, narrows his eyes and raises his arms. The flames in the fireplace turn the color of sapphires and leap out towards Sir Bobby, fully engulfing him inside. Sir Bobby screams.

Lord Anthony rushes forth toward the fire, then turns to Lord benhoidal. “What have you done?!”

Sir Bobby’s voice echoes around the room. “It’s alright Sir Anthony. It’s not hot. Cool actually. It kind of tickles.”

The flames swirl around Sir Bobby, then leave him and shoot into Lord benhoidal’s outstretched hand, where they hover in a small orb. The rest of the room has gone pitch black. Lord benhoidal thrusts his arm forward once more and the flames shoot back into the fireplace, but maintain their new color. This time, there are definitely faces flickering in the flames. We faintly hear the whine of their screams.

Sir Anthony is staring at his teammate with his mouth agape. We see that Sir Bobby has grown at least a foot, and has new muscles that he didn’t have before.

Sir Bobby: “Woah!”

Lord benhoidal: “Do not doubt me again Sir Bobby. If it wasn’t for the meddling of the other red priest, I would be in first place in the tilts. Because of his magic, I started near the bottom, but my rise is imminent. It took me a couple of moons to figure out why it was that I was doing so poorly, but magic always leaves a trace. He has been dealt with. Now it is time to claim what is mine! Take the goblet. Have each knight drink deeply. Victory will be mine at last!”

The two knights exit the room. We hear the patter of their feet going down the staircase. Lord benhoidal smirks. He slowly turns towards the maroon door. We hear another thud against it from the inside and Lord benhoidal creeps towards it, taking his time. He stretches out a hand and tickles the devil on the door. It starts to dance and the door swings open. We see a figure curled on the floor in a fetal position. A glowing golden rope is tied across its body and hands. From the glow of the rope we can just make out two pointed horns on the figure’s head. We zoom in slightly and its features come in to focus. It is Lord benhoidal.

Our camera angle shifts and we are looking out from inside the closet into the main room. We hear a whimper from behind us. Ahead of us, framed in the doorway and wearing the same red robes, we see the figure who a second before was in the image of Lord benhoidal. The air shimmers in front of the figure’s face for a second before clearing and we can see who is behind the illusion.

Lord ashamael: “Hello again, old friend.”

Our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES

Season 2 - Episode 21: Heart of a Barracuda
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to a great feast where Lord dh555 is addressing the Lords of the realm.

Lord dh555: “Lords, this tournament shall be like none other this realm has ever known. Preliminary rounds shall last six weeks. Then, we shall have five great final tournaments held, with the winners sparring off until only one remains. Whoever amongst you shall reign victorious shall be named the next King of the SAVAGE LANDS.”

Cut to a large room in a great fortress. Sir Anthony of Brow and Sir Bobby are talking to Lord benhoidal. A goblet materializes out of thin air and into Lord benhoidal’s hand. We see that it is filled to the brim with the green bubbly liquid from the largest of the three cauldrons behind him. He turns back around and hands it to Sir Anthony, who crinkles his nose in disgust.

Lord benhoidal: “This is why I have called you here today. Bring this goblet to our battle with Lord ashamael on the morrow. Have all of your knights drink deeply from it.”

Lord Anthony: “But My Lord, there isn’t enough for us all!”

Lord benhoidal: “Oh, you will find that this goblet is never empty as long as it is whole. Once you have all had your fill, victory will be found at the bottom.”

Cut to the stands around the main fighting courtyard. All of the lords who still have teams remaining are seated together.

In the back row on the far left is an empty chair with a name tag for Lord 20ks. We zoom in on the name tag.

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 21: Heart of a Barracuda

Scene opens to a lone funeral pyre boat on the shore of Blackwater Bay in King’s Landing. Inside the boat, resting on straw is a stoic figure. He is covered in a large blue quilt with a sizable silver barracuda in the center of it. Inside the barracuda sigil is a blue number twenty. On top of the quilt rests a great sword and a shield which also sports a barracuda and a number twenty as a crest. At the back of the pyre, a flag pole is set into the straw. The flag that sways at the top of the pole also carries the same crest. In the water behind the pyre, we see Sir Hakeem and Sir Oscar, clad in light armor, launch the small boat out to sea. They turn back to the shore where the rest of their team stands.

Sir Paul George steps forth carrying a longbow and a grim expression. He walks over to a lit torch and dips an arrow into the flames. The arrow ignites, and Sir Paul George draws his bow back. He glances quickly at the boat downstream, then lets loose.

We follow the arrow’s flight as it soars into the air. It arcs high in the sky, before plummeting downward. It lands softly in the water, making a small splash, about twenty meters shy of the boat. Sir Paul George looks on with a grimace. The other knights exchange quick glances.

Sir Paul George reaches into his quiver for another arrow, lights it, and draws it back. He lets it loose and the eyes of all the watching knights follow the arrow’s path. This time, the arrow flies errantly off to the side and over a cluster of trees. We hear soft mutterings from the knights behind Sir Paul George as well as a few quiet chuckles. Sir Reggie the Miller lets loose a great sigh from behind him.

We cut quickly to the flight of the arrow as it flies high over the trees and arcs downward onto a windy street. It strikes hard into a goblet being carried by Sir Anthony of Brow who is riding with his teammate Sir Bobby. The goblet shatters onto the ground and Sir Anthony and Sir Bobby dismount their horses and quickly try to save the liquid.

Sir Anthony: “Oh no! There are only a few drops left! This potion was supposed to lead us to victory!”

Sir Bobby: “There’s just enough to give to each starter, but only for one fight. We will have to pick our battle wisely.”

We cut back to the shore. Sir Paul George is looking frustrated now and lights one more arrow. He takes a deep breath, pulls back the bow string, and releases. Instead of watching the arrow this time, our camera focuses on Sir Paul George’s face. We hear a soft “Plop” from the distance and Sir Paul George closes his eyes in disappointment. This time the other knights are less quiet about their mutterings.

Sir Oscar: “I thought his nickname was Playoff P? He can’t hit a shot!”

Sir Middleton: “More like PG13%, am I right?”

Sir J.J.: “The pyre is too far now, no one will be able to light it!”

We focus on Sir Reggie once more, who shakes his head before pushing past Sir Paul George and forcefully taking the bow from his hands. He shoves Sir Paul George out of the way and lights an arrow in the flames. He raises his head and looks over to a flag off to the side on the shore which bears the barracuda crest with the number twenty inside. The flag is blowing steadily in the direction of the wind. Sir Reggie draws back the bow, and releases.

Sir Reggie turns around while the arrow is still airborne, flips the bow to Sir Paul George, and walks off.

We focus on the boat, which is now turning slightly around a bend. The arrow strikes down into the straw next to Lord 20ks and spreads its flames.

The knights on the shore bow their heads and pay their last respects to their Lord.

We cut to the fighting courtyard where the knights from House 20ks are getting ready to fight.

Sir Oscar: “What little hope we had is now lost. We are only still alive in two of the tournaments, and now that our lord has left us, we are sure to lose. We play Lord benhoidal in both tournaments. What chance do we have?”

Sir Reggie: “Sir Hakeem, fearless leader, you fought for Lord benhoidal during the Savage War. Surely you can guide us. Tell us how to beat the Devil Lord.”

The knights all look over to their tallest knight. Sir Hakeem makes a grand figure, standing straight, fully armored apart from his helm, and framed by the setting sun behind him. He is looking off into the distance, but turns his head round to face his fellow knights.

“Lord benhoidal’s knights are bigger than we are. They are faster, stronger, more experienced, and on paper, they’re just better. And they know it too. Lord benhoidal is as cocky a Lord as there has ever been. But I want to tell you something that they don’t know.”

Sir Hakeem looks each of his fellow knights in the eye.

“They don’t know our heart. Lord 20ks had the biggest heart of any lord I have ever had the pleasure of fighting for. Our lord had a rough go of it from the very start of this process. During the selection draft he was run over by a carriage being driven by Lord robusk. Did that stop him?”

The knights gathered round all shout in unison, “No!”

Sir Hakeem: “When the preseason polls came out, not one lord gave us a chance. Did that stop Lord 20ks?”

“No!”

Sir Hakeem: “When we started off the tournament red-hot and shot to the top of the standings, no one noticed. No one gave us credit. Did that stop our lord?”

“No!”

Sir Hakeem: “No! Lord 20ks’s heart was so big, that he had to plunge his dagger through it to escape his pain. And when he did, not one lord cared. Not one lord even noticed. They do not have the hearts of our Lord. And Lord benhoidal? Does he even have a heart? I am sick and tired of hearing about what a great lord he is. He does not have our heart. No one in this tournament has our heart.”

Sir Hakeem looks off into the distance for a second and when he turns back to his fellow knights, his voice is but a whisper.

Sir Hakeem: “Lay that heart on the line today. If you do that, we cannot lose. Lord 20ks may not be with us on the field this fight, but he will be watching. We are the only ones left who care. We are the only ones left who still honor his memory. Show him what our hearts are made of!”

Sir Hakeem unsheathes his sword, plunges it in the air, and screams, “For Lord 20ks!”

“Lord 20ks!”

Sir Hakeem: “BARRACUDAS!”

“BARRACUDAS!”

The knights charge the field, following Sir Hakeem’s lead. We hear the clash of steel as they cross blades with Lord benhoidal’s knights.

Sir Cowens, Sir Bellamy, and Sir Varejao are immediately knocked out by the war hammer of Sir Boban, the Giant Slayer.

Sir J.J., Sir Wesley, and Sir Middleton are shot full of arrows a second later by Sir Danny the Green.

Sir Richardson, Sir King, and Sir Paul George are felled by Sir Deron, Sir Nate, and Sir Mullin.

Sir Reggie is loosing arrows left and right, but none can pierce the belly of the Boogie Knight, who laughs and cuts Sir Reggie down.

Sir Oscar tries a triple strike against Sir Jamario, Sir Bell, and Sir John Collins, but all three knights parry. He then tries a double strike against Sir Jamario and Sir Bell. The two knights parry, and Sir John Collins steps in and stabs Sir Oscar.

Sir Hakeem is locked in combat with Sir Anthony of Brow, Sir Artis the Rigorous, and Sir Bobby. He manages to shake the blades of Sir Anthony and Sir Bobby, and land one of his own on Sir Artis. Another shake and he dodges a blow from Sir Bobby and rings his helm with his blade. As Sir Anthony strikes forward, Sir Hakeem blocks the thrust with his shield, shakes his own sword in the air, and then plunges it forward. Sir Anthony barely manages to parry and is knocked to the ground.

The rest of Lord benhoidal’s knights join Sir Anthony, Sir Artis, and Sir Bobby and surround Sir Hakeem.

Sir Hakeem lets loose a guttural scream and charges straight towards the enemy knights. “TWENTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!”

We cut to Sir Hakeem laying on the ground moaning as Sir Anthony and Sir Bobby stand over him.

Sir Bobby: “Which lord did we just fight anyways?”

Sir Anthony: “I have no idea.”

Our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Episode 22: The Meme Lord
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to Lord jpevans31 talking to Lord albiband as they play chess in the crowd. “Well it looks like Lord pexetera will probably win the tournament and become King. I heard some rumblings that the ‘Kool Kids’ as Lord amerk likes to call them, might not be okay with this and may try to unseat him with one of their own. Lord dBKC is probably their best shot. If Lord pexetera does win, look for there to be another war and lords will have to choose sides.”

Our camera swings to another section of the stands where Lord jhsukow has out a sketchpad. We zoom in on it and see he is drawing a cartoon with caricatures of the other Lords.

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 22: The Meme Lord

Scene opens to Lord jhsukow opening a door to the kitchens under the Red Keep in King’s Landing. Behind him we see Sir Magic, Sir Pippen, Sir Russell, and Sir Boozer. Lord jhsukow and his knights walk through the aisles of the kitchens and we see a number of knights hard at work baking and decorating cakes. Sir Noah is seen adding a leafy ingredient to his cake while Sir Kemp seems to be putting another bun in the oven. Sir Simmons is decorating one of the cakes and is leaning in really close so that he doesn’t miss with the frosting. Sir Love is looking everywhere for the black frosting, while Sir Boozer is avoiding his eye and checking out his brand new hairline in the mirror.

Near the back of the kitchen we see Sir Stephen, who is wearing a towering chef’s hat and putting the finishing touches on a massive birthday cake. Sir Stephen sees the retinue of knights following Lord jhsukow and beckons them forward. He opens a door on the back wall and they enter into a large back room.

The room is full of baking supplies lining the shelves on either side. At the far end of the room, sitting on a throne made of pots and pans, a plethora of unopened presents at his feet, is Lord dBKC. Sir Stephen approaches the throne and leans in to whisper something into Lord dBKC’s ear. Lord dBKC nods slightly and Sir Stephen straightens to address Lord jhsukow and his knights.

Sir Stephen: “You stand in the presence of Lord dBKC of the ‘Kool Kids,’ runner-up in the first Savage War, rightful heir to the Iron Throne, rightful King of the Savage Lands, Slayer of riddles and rhymes, Master of notecards, Expert in drunken drafting, and Lord of motherf*cking birthdays.”

Lord jhsukow looks a little uneasy and turns to Sir Magic.

Sir Magic: “This is Lord jhsukow.”

Lord jhsukow looks over at Sir Magic expecting more. Lord dBKC and Sir Stephen look over at Sir Magic expecting more. Sir Magic’s face does not change as the moments linger.

Lord dBKC clears his throat. “Lord jhsukow, do you know why I have called you here today?”

Lord jhsukow: “Is it for tips on how to defeat the other lords?”

Lord dBKC: “Ah… No. Lord jhsukow, I was hoping you would consider a proposition. As you know, this tournament is, for all intents and purposes, down to Lord pexetera and myself. One of us will become the new Savage King, and will rule the Savage Lands.”

Lord jhsukow: “What about Lord mptrey? I thought he was tied with you after the last round? Now that he got that robot of his working, he seems like he might win the whole thing.”

Lord dBKC: “No, that robot only has so many minutes programmed into it. It will break down again before the tournament is over. The throne is between Lord pexetera and myself. These lands need a merciful king, one who is kind and just. Lord pexetera will bring about a reign of terror unknown to the realm since the first Savage War. We cannot have that. If he wins, there are a number of lords who are planning a rebellion.”

Lord jhsukow: “Why are you telling me this.”

Lord dBKC: “The lords of the realm are choosing sides as we speak. Lord robusk recommends you highly as a prospective lord to join the ‘Kool Kids.’ Right now, Lords robusk, ashamael, and benhoidal have joined forces with mine own. Lord amerk also applied but is demanding that we add ‘Klub’ to our name. He was denied. I have seen the propaganda you have been distributing about and I agree with Lord robusk. We could use someone of your skills on our side. That talent of yours could prove quite useful.”

Lord jhsukow: “I don’t understand. You don’t want me to fight for you? You just want me to continue sketching?”

Lord dBKC: “Let’s be honest about where our talents lie. I am great at selecting knights, making rhymes, and eating motherf*cking birthday cake. You are great at making fun of the other lords. We will make a fine duo. I boom, you shakalaka.”

Lord jhsukow: “It isn’t my fault that I haven’t done well in the tournament. I keep getting the 22nd pick! If I get a better pick next time, I will do better, I swear! I can fight for you!”

Lord dBKC: “Hmm. Well, I would love to have you join us ‘Kool Kids.’ We can talk about your role once you join. Think it over. The future of the Savage Lands is in jeopardy. Which side will you choose?”

Cut to Lord jhsukow and his knights exiting the castle. Immediately, they are set upon by two hooded figures. Within seconds, jhsukow’s knights have been beaten and lie unconscious on the ground. A sack is roughly thrown over Lord jhsukow’s head and our screen goes black.

A second later the sack is removed from Lord jhsukow’s head and he looks around wildly at his surroundings. Colossal trees of maple tower above and in front of him we see a throne made of bones. Sitting on the throne, with five snakes slithering around his feet, we see Lord pexetera. To his sides, Sir Garnett and Sir Jimmy stand vigilant.

Lord pexetera: “Lord jhsukow, please pardon me for the rough treatment. I had to be careful. The ‘Kool Kids’ have spies everywhere.”

Lord jhsukow: “Where are my knights? If any harm has befallen them…”

Lord pexetera: “You’ll what? Don’t worry, they may have a few bruises when they wake up, but they should be fine. Although, they still won’t be able to fight well.”

Lord jhsukow: “Why am I here?”

Lord pexetera: “Oh, I thought that was obvious. I know why you were in the kitchens. I know that Lord dBKC has offered you a place in his group of rebellious lords. He thinks that he can unseat me after I win what is rightfully mine? I was in first place in the Savage War before he had all those motherf*cking birthdays. Now, however, with so many birthdays he has grown old, while I am still young and powerful. His bones will be added to this throne once all is said and done. I will win this tournament, and when I do, I need lords who are loyal to me. I am prepared to make you an offer you cannot refuse.”

Lord jhsukow: “Oh? And what is that?”

Lord pexetera: “I would like to make you the Hand of the King.”

Lord jhsukow: “...”

Lord pexetera: “I am not as popular as the ‘Kool Kids.’ I need someone like you on my side who can rally the other lords. Everyone likes your sketches.”

Lord jhsukow: “So you only want me, because of my sketches?”

Lord pexetera: “Well, what else can you offer?”

Lord jhsukow: “I will do better in the next Savage War as long as I don’t get the 22nd pick again. I can select better knights to serve me, I swear!”

Lord pexetera: “Hmm. Well we can discuss that once you join. Think about it. Hand of the King.”

Cut to Lord jhsukow walking out of the godswood. All of a sudden, a giant clawed robotic hand comes out of the trees and grabs him back into the forest. Lord jhsukow yells out and the next second, we see him standing before Lord mptrey. Lord mptrey is wearing long beaver skinned furs and is accompanied by Sir Chris Paul, Sir Dirk, and the robot, Sir Kawhi.

Lord mptrey: “Pardon me friend. I was hoping we could chat, eh?”

Lord jhsukow: “You know you could have just asked, you don’t need to kidnap me?”

Lord mptrey: “Sorry for the kerfuffle. I didn’t want us to be seen, eh?”

Lord jhsukow: “Why not?”

Lord mptrey: “Well, right now, Lords dBKC and pexetera are locked in a kerfuffle over who gets to be king. Neither seems to realize that my knights are right behind them, eh? Lord jhsukow, I am tired of being overlooked by the other Lords. Have you ever felt overlooked, eh? Have you ever felt unnoticed, eh?”

Lord jhsukow: “Once or twice.”

Lord mptrey: “Then join me. Together we can win this kerfuffle for the little guy, eh?

Lord jhsukow: “I suppose you want me to sketch funny caricatures of the other lords and spread them about the city?”

Lord mptrey: “What? Heavens no. I need lords who can fight. You may not have done that well in this tournament, but that’s only because you had the 22nd pick. You would have done much better with a better pick, eh?”

Lord jhsukow: “That’s right!”

Lord mptrey: “Join with me in this kerfuffle Lord jhsukow. Help me win the throne. Only then, will peace befall the Savage Lands.”

Our camera zooms in on Lord jhsukow’s face. As he ponders his decision, our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES

Season 2 - Episode 23: The Ford
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to the injury tent where Dr. J is seen treating a number of knights for various injuries.

Sir Blake points to a heap of bodies lying on the ground at the back of the tent. “And what about them? Why don’t they get beds?”

Dr. J: “Oh those are Lord tarheel’s knights. They are dead. Slayed by Sir Michael of Jordan for not practicing hard enough. I think it is just Sir Michael and Sir Melo on that team now. Somehow, Lord tarheel is still in the middle of the pack.”

Cut to the stands in the great arena. We focus in on Lord pharrop, who is absentmindedly patting the head of Lord Brad of the Longest and Tallest House. Lord Brad’s head is resting on Lord pharrop’s shoulder deep in sleep. Next to them, Lord dh555 steps towards the front to address the crowd. “Ladies and Gentlemen of Westeros. Six weeks ago began the greatest tournament this realm has ever known. We have seen bloodshed, glory, and some of the best fighting in history. But, we are not done yet. The seeding rounds are over, and we have narrowed the field down. There will be five champions of these final tilts, and the one who scores highest overall shall be crowned champion and King of the Land!” He steps away for a second and grabs a purple pillow upon which rests a large ornate crown. He hoists it into the air in front of him and exclaims, “Let the playoffs begin!”

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 23: The Ford

Scene opens to the great arena in the middle of King’s Landing. The clang of swords upon shields rings through the courtyard as we take in the scene. There are five battles happening at once. We zoom in briefly on the sidelines of the first battle courtyard. The fights in this part of the arena have already finished and Lord dh555, Lord pexetera, and bds9992 are all looking smug. Lord amerk’s knights are rushing off the field victorious as well, but their lord is nowhere to be seen. On the sidelines of the second courtyard, Lord dBKC and 24kpyrite have emerged victorious. All of the other battles are still going on.

Our camera zooms in on the sidelines between the second and third battle and we see Lord Brad of the Longest and Tallest House pacing back and forth. He makes his way over to the third battle and approaches Lord dh555.

Lord Brad: “Good luck, Lord Hand. It should be a great battle.”

Lord dh555: “Lord Brad, I am surprised you haven’t fallen asleep yet. Yes it should be a good fight if my guys can figure out how to win.”

Lord Brad blinks a few times then hustles over to the second battle and up next to Lord tarheel.

Lord tarheel: “Lord Brad, how are you still awake? Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

Lord Brad: “I’m going to try to stay awake for these battles. I fell asleep in the first round and woke up to learn that I had lost both fights. I think this battle is my best chance. My knights have really been fighting well.”

We follow his gaze to the battle and take in the scene. Sir Michael of Jordan and Sir Melo stand surrounded by the knights of the Longest and Tallest House. Sir Duncan is carrying a large shield made of glass. Sir DeAndre pulls out a large great sword and lumbers forward. Sir Horford flinches exaggeratedly as Sir Chauncey pulls a short dagger from its sheath.

Sir Chauncey: “It’s only a dagger, why are you flinching so much?”

Sir Horford: “I thought it would be funny.”

Sir Chauncey: “Maybe the first time. Now it’s just dumb.”

Next to them, Sir Yao, Sir Bledsoe, Sir Nelson, and Sir J.R. all brandish weapons. Sir Michael and Sir Melo are outnumbered badly and being backed towards the sidelines. Sir Melo wildly attempts a midrange strike, but Sir Duncan calmly uses the glass on his shield to parry. Sir Michael tries to attack Sir Duncan while his back is turned but Sir Melo steps in front of Sir Michael and tries another midrange strike. Sir Michael jumps high in the air, over Sir Melo’s head and attempts another strike, this time at Sir Horford, but Sir Melo gets in his way again.

Sir Michael: “You should have stayed on the bench for this fight Sir Melo. You’re taking all my attacks!”

Sir Melo turns to the sidelines and looks at Lord tarheel. He points over at Sir Michael. “Yo T, this guy wants me to come off the bench. Who does he think he is?”

Lord tarheel: “Maybe Lord Brad can mediate?” He turns to look at Lord Brad who is visibly nodding off. “Hey Brad, wake up!”

Lord Brad: “Huh? Oh, well maybe they can take turns attacking my knights?”

Sir Michael’s eyes narrow and his lips make a competitive snarl. He brings up his sword and drives it through Sir Melo’s armor. Sir Melo makes a quiet whimper as he falls to the ground.

Sir Michael is now alone, surrounded by enemy knights. He looks beaten. Sweat is pouring down his face. He looks over to Lord tarheel who throws him a blue bottle with a red cap. There is a yellow note attached to it and something is written in black child like handwriting. Sir Michael quickly takes a sip from the bottle and flips it back to Lord tarheel.

Instantly, we see a change come over Lord Michael. He is no longer sweating and even seems to glow faintly. He raises his sword and all of a sudden, his attacks are faster than humanly possible. He is parrying everything and lashing out left and right with his blade. He slashes through Sir Chauncey and Sir Bledsoe with ease, then cuts down the knees of Sir Yao. As Sir Yao falls down, Sir Michael thrusts his blade through his armor.

There are only three knights facing Sir Michael now. Sir Duncan, Sir DeAndre, and Sir Horford start to circle him. We cut to the sideline where Lord Brad is covering his eyes with his hands.

Lord tarheel: “Lord Brad, you can look, you are sure to win this battle now. Lord Brad?”

Lord tarheel moves towards Lord Brad and removes his hands from his face. Lord Brad has fallen asleep standing up.

We cut to the third battle scene where things have gotten out of hand. Sir Kobe has unleashed his pet Black Mamba on Lord Brad’s knights and it is chasing them around the arena. Behind it, the rest of Lord dh555’s army gives chase as well. Sir Duncan and Sir DeAndre are in the lead, rushing out of the arena doors. Sir Chauncey leaps from foot to foot trying to evade the large slithering snake. He finally jumps on Sir Horford’s back and the two of them leave through the arena doors. Sir Chauncey slams the door behind them and we hear a great thud. The rest of Lord Brad’s army falls behind and is slaughtered.

Sir Duncan, Sir DeAndre, and Sir Horford, with Sir Chauncey on his back, stumble onto the streets. They are panting heavily.

Sir Duncan: “Did we lose them?”

Sir Horford: “Horford.”

Just then, we hear a loud screech and we see from high above, the Three Eyed Bird of Bostonia dive bombing the army. A moment later the arena doors open with a bang and the Hand’s knights tumble out into streets in hot pursuit.

Lord Brad’s knights flee to a nearby crossing bridge over a small ford.

Sir Duncan: “If we can just make it past that ford we can get back to the arena and still win this thing.”

The knights hurry over to the ford, but the opposing army is catching up with them. Sir DeAndre falls behind.

Sir Duncan: “What are you doing?”

Sir DeAndre looks at the approaching army, then back at his fellow knights. “Go! If you can make it back across the ford and to the arena we may yet win!” He turns back to the approaching army and raises his blade.

We cut back to Sir Duncan, Sir Horford and Sir Chauncey, but hear the clash of steel and a shout as Sir Jordan falls. The trio has now made it to the bridge. Sir Duncan crosses first, followed by Sir Chauncey on Sir Horford’s back. Sir Horford stops suddenly. He reaches behind him and grabs Sir Chauncey by the shoulders, hoists him up, and throws him over to Sir Duncan, who catches him in mid-air. Sir Horford nods at Sir Duncan then turns around. Sir Duncan pauses for a second, then nods his own head. “Hold the ford.” He hoists Sir Chauncey on his back and turns towards the arena.

Sir Chauncey: “What are you doing? We can’t leave Sir Horford!”

Sir Duncan shouts over his head once more, “HOLD THE FORD!”

We zoom in on Sir Horford as the Hand’s army reaches the bridge. He raises his sword and lets out his battle cry. “HORFORD!”

As the knights reach him, he starts parrying their blows and delivering some of his own. Some of his opponents fall down and get swept up by the river, but there are too many of them. Up over his head we see the Three Eyed Bird diving steeply right towards him. We hear its deafening shriek and our screen goes black.

We cut to the arena and to the second battle. Sir Michael is holding his own against Sir Duncan, Sir DeAndre, and Sir Horford in this fight, but is clearly growing tired. Just then, there’s a loud commotion in the stands and the arena doors bust open. Sir Duncan from the third battle rushes in carrying a crying Sir Chauncey on his back. The duo stumbles forward and collapses onto their court. Everyone in the arena holds their breath and looks to the door, but no one follows.

We zoom in on the sidelines. Lord dh555 is shaking his head and trying to rouse Lord Brad from his standing slumber. “Lord Brad, Lord Brad, wake up. It looks like you won.”

Lord Brad shakes himself awake. “I won? Really?”

From somewhere outside of the arena, we hear the piercing cry of a large bird.

Sir Michael uses the disturbance to attack Sir Duncan and Sir DeAndre and quickly defeats the two knights. He turns toward Sir Horford, but stops. Something weird is happening.

Sir Horford is standing still and has dropped his blade to the ground. All of a sudden, his eyes roll back into his head and we can see the whites behind them. He crumbles to the ground and starts shaking uncontrollably. He starts to shout loudly, while still convulsing on the grass. “HOLD THE FORD! HOLD THE FORD! HOLD FORD! HOLD FORD! HORDFORD! HORDFORD! HORFORD! HORFORD! HORFORD!”

As this is happening the doors to the arena burst open once more. We see Sir Kobe, Sir Kidd, Sir Tracy, and Sir Buck emerge into the stadium, swords drawn. They advance towards Sir Duncan and Sir Billups who are on the ground panting, bruised, beaten.

Lord dh555: “Well, maybe not. Looks like I win after all. Sorry Brad. Brad? Brad?”

We pan over and see that Lord Brad of the Longest and Tallest House has fallen asleep once more.

We cut back over to the second battlefield. Sir Michael looms over the fallen body of Sir Horford who is still shaking uncontrollably.

“HORFORD! HORFORD!”

Sir Michael: “You only brought twelve knights to fight me?”

“HORFORD!”

Sir Michael thrusts his sword downward through Sir Horford’s armor. Sir Horford stops shaking and shouting all at once. We zoom in on Sir Michael.

“I take that personally.”

Sir Michael looks right at the camera and smirks as our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Episode 24: yeah, sure, whatever
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to the stands of the great arena. Lord dh555 steps towards the front to address the crowd. “Ladies and Gentlemen of Westeros. Six weeks ago began the greatest tournament this realm has ever known. We have seen bloodshed, glory, and some of the best fighting in history. But, we are not done yet. The seeding rounds are over, and we have narrowed the field down. There will be five champions of these final tilts, and the one who scores highest overall shall be crowned champion and King of the Land!” He steps away for a second and grabs a purple pillow upon which rests a large ornate crown. He hoists it into the air in front of him and exclaims, “Let the playoffs begin!”

Cut to Sir Wilt being held down by three monkey acolytes in the temple of No Evil. We see Lord Gerry the Red approach.

Lord Gerry: “We will take your eyes, your ears, your voice. All men must serve, and you shall serve by leading our house to victory in the Hand’s Tournament. Then, and only then, will you be able to give the Gift to Sir Russell and the other Shamrock Knights. So I ask again, can you pay the price?”

The camera zooms in on Wilt’s face. He is trembling but he manages to nod. The camera angle shifts and we find ourselves looking through Wilt’s eyes. The monkey with the fiery brand lashes out, and our screen goes dark.

Cut to a quick shot of Sir Giannis puking his guts out in the medical tent.

Cut to Lord jpevans31 hovering over a chess board in the stands. “Look for there to be another war and lords will have to choose sides.”

Cut to Lord dBKC sitting on a throne made of pots and pans: “The lords of the realm are choosing sides as we speak.”

Cut to the highest tower of Devilstone. We see Lord benhoidal approaching a maroon door with an outline of a golden devil on it. He stretches out a hand and tickles the devil on the door. It starts to dance and the door swings open. We see a figure curled on the floor in a fetal position. A glowing golden rope is tied across its body and hands. From the glow of the rope we can just make out two pointed horns on the figure’s head. We zoom in slightly and its features come in to focus. It is Lord benhoidal.

Our camera angle shifts and we are looking out from inside the closet into the main room. We hear a whimper from behind us. Ahead of us, framed in the doorway and wearing the same red robes, we see the figure who a second before was in the image of Lord benhoidal. The air shimmers in front of the figure’s face for a second before clearing and we can see who is behind the illusion.

Lord ashamael: “Hello again, old friend.”

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 24: yeah, sure, whatever

Scene opens to the great arena in the middle of King’s Landing. We zoom in on the section in the stands where the defeated lords are watching the action. We see Lords albiband, jpevans31, ysw128, jhsukow, and goetz93 already in their seats. Walking down the aisles to join them we see Lords mikee1, pharrop, Gerry the Red, and Brad of the Longest and Tallest House. The lords all sit down and we zoom in on Lord ysw128 and Lord pharrop who are trying to figure out how it went so wrong for them in the tournament.

Lord pharrop: “I think Sir Walton is where you went wrong in the selection process.”

Lord ysw128: “you sure? walton?”

Lord pharrop: “Yes, you already had Sir Malone and Sir McHale. I would have thought you would have gone after a quicker knight next, or maybe an archer.”

Lord ysw128: “you’re so witty.”

Lord pharrop: “Why thank you! Although you would never know it from my tournament performance. If only Sir Giannis hadn’t gotten sick when it mattered.”

Lord ysw128: “yeah, sure, whatever.”

Lord pharrop looks affronted by the lack of attention given to him by Lord ysw128, but then is distracted by a loud commotion near the sidelines.

Sir Durant, Sir Chandler, and Sir Drexler are laughing hysterically and falling over each other in amusement.

Sir Durant: “I can’t believe our Lord rested his best knights and we still are going to win!”

Sir Drexler: “Maybe we aren’t his best knights?”

The trio all look over towards the third courtyard and we follow their gaze. Sir Armstrong, Sir Granger, Sir Odom, Sir Okafor, and Sir Przybilla are all taking turns whacking Sir Harden with their swords as Sir Harden’s teammates look on.

Sir Harden: “Aren’t you guys going to help me?”

Sir Dikembe wags his finger: “No, no, no.”

Sir Wall: “Sir Dikembe is right. You never let us help you during the season, why should we help you know? We are tired of you getting all the attacks!”

We cut over to the section of the stands where the lords still in the tournament are sitting. Lord robusk is walking over to Lord benhoidal, who is fidgeting uncomfortably and watching the fourth court in despair.

Lord robusk: “I know I’ve been critical of your tactics in the past, but allowing my best knights to rest is certainly proving to be quite advantageous. I went with the full Ben in this one.”

Lord benhoidal: “What? Oh yes, I suppose that is one of my tactics.”

Lord robusk: “Why are you looking at the fourth courtyard? Your team is playing over on court five.”

Lord benhoidal quickly positions himself to look at the next courtyard over.

Lord robusk: “At least you’re not doing as poorly as Lord ashamael. He’s getting swept by Lord jcred5.”

Lord benhoidal grimaces and balls his hands into fists.

We cut back to where Lord ysw128 is sitting. He has moved away from Lord pharrop and now is sitting between Lord Gerry the Red and Lord Brad of the Longest and Tallest House. Lord Brad is blinking heavily. Lord Gerry is covering his eyes with one hand and alternating between ears with the other.

Lord Gerry: “I just wish Sir Wilt would have been able to get his revenge on Sir Russell. I did promise him after all when he joined my guild.”

Lord jhsukow overhears this from behind them and pipes in: “How did you not make it past the second round with any of the Wilts? That best Wilt should be an automatic championship.”

Lord Gerry: “Well Sir Wilt was so preoccupied with going after Sir Russell, that he didn’t fight well in the tournaments.”

Lord jhsukow: “Maybe it’s because you burned out his eyes, lopped off his ears, and sliced his throat?”

Lord Gerry: “No, that can’t be it. See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. That’s the creed.”

Lord ysw128: “you sliced wilt?”

Lord Gerry: “Sorry, can you speak into my other ear? I am covering this one currently.”

Lord ysw128: “yeah, sure, whatever.”

Lord jhsukow: “So who do you guys think will win it all? I thought for sure it was going to be Lord pexetera, but he’s getting swept by Lord dBKC so far and is barely hanging on against bds9992. If he doesn’t win one of the tournaments, he’s going to fall short again.”

Lord Gerry: “He has too many knights who only know how to do inside attacks. He needs more archers. Sir Stephen is killing him with those outside strikes.”

Lord Brad lets out a loud yawn and rests his head on Lord ysw128’s shoulder.

Lord ysw128: “yawn softer, weirdo.”

Lord jhsukow: “Then there’s dBKC. He’s the obvious choice right now, but is losing to both Lord 24kpyrite on court two and getting swept by the Hand on court three. Is one championship enough to win the throne? What if he can’t even win one?”

Lord Brad snores faintly and cuddles in close to Lord ysw128.

Lord ysw128: “you’re so warm.”

Lord jhsukow: “Both the Hand, Lord dh555 and mptrey look like they are pretty safe to advance one of their teams, but they’re both down in their other battle. If one of them can get two teams into the finals, they might have a chance.”

Lord ysw128: “you’re so wrong.”

Lord jhsukow: “I don’t know, I think they might just do it. And what about bds9992? He’s down to possibly his last fight! Is this the end of him? Will the gods decide he is guilty? Or can he pull off one last miracle?”

Lord Gerry: “If he can’t win with Sir LeBron, will he ever win a championship and gain his lordship?”

Lord ysw128: “youngling stays winless.”

Lord jhsukow: “All I know is that this is the most exciting finish to a tournament yet. I don’t know who’s going to win this thing, but I’m already looking forward to the next Savage War.”

Lord ysw128: “yikes. savage war?”

Lord Gerry: “What do you mean, the next savage war?”

Lord jhsukow: “Oh, you haven’t heard? Whomever wins between Lord pexetera and Lord dBKC, the other is going to start a rebellion. Lords are already choosing who to follow. As long as I don’t get the 22nd pick next time, I’m sure to be on the winning side.”

Lord ysw128: “you surely won’t.”

Lord jhsukow: “Hey, at least I did better than you!”

Lord ysw128: “you sonuva witch.”

Lord jhsukow looks at him strangely and starts to speak, but before he can get the words out we hear a loud uproar from the next section over.

Lord benhoidal is now standing up and no longer looking at the fourth courtyard. His eyes are wide open in surprise. We follow his gaze across the stands and we see what the commotion is about.

Another Lord benhoidal is striding towards the first one, a furious look on his face, a fiery golden rope trailing behind him attached to one ankle.

The crowd is in an uproar. Lord ysw128 stands along with the rest of his section and starts yelling strong words as our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Episode 25: The Has-Beens
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to the courtroom where bds9992 is standing trial.

bds9992: “I did not kill King Kinoa, but I wish I had. I wish I was the monster you think I am. I wish I had enough poison for the whole lot of you. You thought Sir Iggy at point guard was extreme? Were you surprised when I took the Jester Knight, Sir Jokic in the second round? Just wait. Sir Clint at small forward. Sir LeBron at center. Sir Cheeks at the four. You'll never stop me! NEVER!"

The crowd is in an uproar.

bds9992 turns back and stares menacingly at Lord robusk. “I now know I will get no justice here, so I will let the gods decide my fate. I DEMAND TRIAL BY COMBAT!”

Cut to the tower of the Hand of the King. Lord dh555 is sitting at his desk and talking to his knights.

Sir Jason: “My Lord, I’m sorry the trial didn’t go as planned. I know how much you wanted to see bds9992 executed.”

Lord dh555: “It makes no matter. He demanded trial by combat. In order to be set free he would have to win one of the five tournaments. Little chance of that.”

Sir Tracy: “He’s actually doing quite well. He’s in second place overall and is tied for first in one of the tournaments.”

Lord dh555: “It won’t last. It’s bds9992. You know him, he’s going to do something foolish eventually. He’ll promote Sir Zelmo, or worse, let Sir Westbrook lead an attack.”

The air shimmers and we cut to a hallway outside the throne room. Lord dh555 is standing alone apart from the Three Eyed Bird on his shoulder. His eyes are glossed over. We hear a voice from the shadows say, “Remember, it is imperative for bds9992 to be found guilty. If he is found innocent, the Lords may start to question how King Kinoa really died. We cannot allow them to become suspicious.”

With a pop the shadow disappears and dh555’s eyes regain their color. He begins to march towards the doors of the throne room. He passes an adjacent hallway and the camera briefly catches Sir Shaq listening with his ear to the wall. Lord dh555 does not notice him and proceeds to open the doors and enters the throne room.

Cut to the highest tower of Devilstone. Lord benhoidal is seen talking with Sir Anthony and Sir Bobby. A goblet materializes out of thin air and into his hand. It is filled with a green bubbly liquid. He hands it to Sir Anthony, who crinkles his nose in disgust.

Lord benhoidal: “This is why I have called you here today. Bring this goblet to our battle with Lord ashamael on the morrow. Have all of your knights drink deeply from it.”

Lord Anthony: “But My Lord, there isn’t enough for us all!”

Lord benhoidal: “Oh, you will find that this goblet is never empty as long as it is whole. Once you have all had your fill, victory will be found at the bottom.”

Cut to Lord benhoidal approaching a maroon door with an outline of a golden devil on it. He stretches out a hand and tickles the devil on the door. It starts to dance and the door swings open. We see a figure curled on the floor in a fetal position. A glowing golden rope is tied across its body and hands. From the glow of the rope we can just make out two pointed horns on the figure’s head. We zoom in slightly and its features come in to focus. It is Lord benhoidal.

Our camera angle shifts and we are looking out from inside the closet into the main room. We hear a whimper from behind us. Ahead of us, framed in the doorway and wearing the same red robes, we see the figure who a second before was in the image of Lord benhoidal. The air shimmers in front of the figure’s face for a second before clearing and we can see who is behind the illusion.

Lord ashamael: “Hello again, old friend.”

Cut to the great arena and into the crowd. We zoom in on Lord benhoidal whose eyes are wide open in surprise. We follow his gaze across the stands and we see what the commotion is about.

Another Lord benhoidal is striding towards the first one, a furious look on his face, a fiery golden rope trailing behind him attached to one ankle.

The crowd is in an uproar.

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 25: The Has-Beens

Scene opens to the great arena in the middle of King’s Landing. We zoom into the crowd and see two different Lord benhoidal’s facing each other. They are both wearing red robes. One has a golden rope tied to an ankle. The face of the other one shimmers and is replaced by the face of Lord ashamael. The crowd around them gasps loudly. The two red priests glare at each other. Lord benhoidal raises a hand and a red fire ignites, crackling between his fingertips. Lord ashamael mirrors the action and a bright blue flame erupts from his palm. The two lords stare daggers at each other before simultaneously moving their lips to cast a spell. Before either one can get their spell off however, they are both pelted with fruit from the audience.

The camera spins to a section of the crowd that we haven’t seen before. A bunch of commoners who are watching the tournament are armed with different food items and are prepared to throw them at the two lords. We hear what a few of them are screaming.

“Boooo!”

“We don’t care about your rivalry!”

“You guys are old news!”

“Has-beens!”

“Sit down and let the better lords fight!”

“Losers!”

We pan back to Lord ashamael and benhoidal who have to duck for cover together underneath a bench.

Lord ashamael: “How dare they call us has-beens! I wrote the usage scroll!”

Lord benhoidal: “And we’ve won the most tournaments in the realm!”

Lord ashamael: “We’re still the best lords, right?”

Lord benhoidal: “Nobody better.”

Lord ashamael: “So why aren’t we doing better in the tournament?”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “What were we arguing about anyways?”

Lord ashamael: “I don’t know. You probably cheated in a tourney long ago.”

Lord benhoidal: “That doesn’t sound right. It was probably something you said.”

Lord ashamael: “No, I’m certain it was something you did.”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

Lord ashamael: “So… how’s your team doing over on court five?”

Lord benhoidal: “I actually kinda forgot they were still in it after being locked in my own tower so long.”

We cut to the fifth court where Lord benhoidal’s knights are lying on the ground puking as Lord mptrey’s knights look on confused.

Sir Dirk: “What happened?”

Sir Chris Paul: “I don’t know. They took this potion and Sir Anthony asked Sir Kawhi if he had any last words. Almost blew a circuit. Next thing I know, they’re all on the ground.”

We cut back to the stands where Lord benhoidal is chuckling. He and Lord ashamael are now eating some of the food that was thrown at them by the spectators.

Lord benhoidal is lazily tossing grapes in his mouth. “Would you look at that! My knights are tanking a game all by themselves. This should lead to easy wins in games six and seven and a finals appearance. I’ve never been more proud. I wonder where they got the tanking potion from?”

Lord ashamael guiltily avoids eye contact.

Lord benhoidal: “Looks like I’ll play Lord dBKC. ‘Kool Kids’ win either way.”

Lord ashamael: “Uhh… maybe you want to check again.”

Lord benhoidal swivels sharply towards court five and we follow his gaze. Sir Chris Paul and Sir Dirk are jumping up and down. Sir Kawhi is expressionless. They are standing over Sir Anthony and Sir Bobby who lay defeated on the field.

Lord benhoidal: “How did I lose? I drafted the best team!”

Lord ashamael: “Maybe we aren’t as good at this as we thought?”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “No. That can’t be it. How are your knights doing on court four anyways?”

We cut to court four where Lord ashamael’s knights are being carted off the field on a gurney pulled by Dr. J. On the other side of the court, Lord dskantor’s knights led by Sir Kareem are valiantly defending against arrows being shot at by Sir Reggie, Sir Paul George, and the rest of Lord 20ks’s knights.

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

Lord ashamael hangs his head. “We were defeated.”

Lord benhoidal: “By a doctor???”

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “Well, that’s okay. You still have other teams left right?”

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “Oh look, fellow ‘Kool Kid’ Lord robusk has just finished defeating Lord cmcafeeky’s knights on court three. Did anyone ever figure out where he ran off to?”

Lord ashamael takes a juicy bite from a peach. “Probably just off somewhere with his sister.”

Lord benhoidal: “Looks like Lord robusk will face the Hand, Lord dh555. I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but it makes no matter now. Lord dh555 has been under my control since before the tournament started.”

Lord ashamael: “That’s hilarious.”

Lord benhoidal: “Yes, I had this grand plan where he would help me take over the throne. I would have done it without his help, but you know, none of the other lords trust me.”

Lord ashamael: “Very smart.”

Lord benhoidal: “Well, that plan isn’t working so well. Turns out my knights aren’t as good as I thought. Even if I would have won the whole thing on court five, the best I could have done was fifth place.”

Lord ashamael: “I would kill someone to take fifth place. Well not just anyone.”

Lord benhoidal: “Hasn’t bds9992 been through enough?”

Lord ashamael: “Never.”

Lord benhoidal: “Oh, look. Sir Michael of Jordan has finally been defeated.”

Lord ashamael: “Fighting by himself like that, it was only a matter of time.”

Lord benhoidal: “Taken down by Lord mptrey’s robot in five games. Now we will never hear the end of those stupid Sir Michael/Sir Kawhi comparisons. Looks like Lord mptrey will get to play Lord 24kpyrite. He’s led by Sir Shaq. I wish I would have drafted high enough to select him. Who wouldn’t want Sir Shaq leading their team?”

Lord ashamael: “...”

Lord benhoidal: “Wait, is that Lord amerk’s team that just defeated the Hand on court one? Ha! I never thought he would ever make the finals in a million years. I guess ever since he retreated into his hole, his knights have been playing better.”

Lord ashamael: “Well, that’s all the courts. When do the finals start?”

Lord benhoidal: “Wait. There’s still one fight going on.”

The two red priests swivel their heads to court one where we see an astounding scene. Eleven of bds9992’s knights lay sprawled on the ground, defeated. Only one knight remains. Sir LeBron stands tall, sweat glistening from his brow, the few hairs he has left billowing in the wind. Surrounding him are all twelve of Lord pexetera’s knights.

Lord ashamael smiles. “Looks like bds9992 won’t be joining us for the next Savage War.”

Sir LeBron swings his sword and immediately overpowers Sir Lee, Sir Zubac and Sir Nance. He swings his sword again and down goes Sir Anderson, Sir Faried, and Sir Delon. He spins and parries a strike from Sir Marshall, spins back around to parry a strike by Sir Ed, then counters with two strikes of his own. Sir Marshall and Sir Ed fall, defeated.

Lord benhoidal: “Maybe bds9992 has a chance? Anyone can win with Sir LeBron.”

There are now only four knights facing Sir LeBron. Sir Garnett, Sir Wade, Sir Jokic, and Sir Jimmy look at each other, then charge. Sir Jokic falls with five quick strikes by Sir LeBron. Sir Jimmy gets in two of his own, but Sir LeBron proves too strong. Sir Dwyane jumps on Sir LeBron’s back and rides him for a while. Sir Garnett meets Sir LeBron’s sword with his own and the two lock in combat. The weight of Sir Dwyane on his back proves too much for Sir LeBron. He can no longer carry him and eventually falls to the ground. Sir Garnett raises his blade.

Our screen goes black and we hear a piercing scream. We cut to the stands behind the two red priests and see bds9992’s horrified face.

Lord ashamael: “Ha! bds9992, won’t be coming back after all!”

bds9992 sinks to his knees. Then, without warning, he scrambles to his feet, and makes a mad dash for the arena door. Standing in his way is Lord Commander Shaq from court two.

We hear Lord dh555’s voice ring out from behind us. “Lord Commander! Stop that man! He has been deemed guilty of regicide by the gods!”

bds9992 comes to a halting stop in front of Sir Shaq who looks down at him sharply. Sir Shaq looks over at Lord dh555 and nimbly side steps. bds9992 rushes past him.

Lord dh555: “Lord Commander, what are you doing?!”

Sir Shaq looks right at the Hand. “MMMBLVRMMMBLVRMMM!!!!!”

bds9992 makes it to the arena doors, pushes them open, and escapes out into the streets.

Lord benhoidal: “I guess bds9992 will be back for the next Savage War after all.”

We cut to the fourth court. Sir Kareem has proved victorious in his battle with Lord 20ks’s knights. With one swift motion, he sweeps his arm around. At the very top of his reach, he releases his sword.

The camera fixates on the arcing sword as it glides through the air, higher and higher, and eventually right out of the arena.

We cut to the streets of King’s Landing where bds9992 is madly sprinting through the streets. He is pushing women and children out of his way and running as fast as he can in a straight line down the street. As he passes a couple of street vendors, we hear one vendor say, “Why doesn’t he zig-zag?”

Sir Kareem’s sword hurtles down from high above, straight towards bds9992 who keeps going in a straight line. We hear another vendor say, “Seriously, why doesn’t he just move to the side?”

The sword comes down and strikes bds9992 right in the ankle. bds9992 lets out a scream of agony and collapses in a puddle of mud. Knights surround him. Lord ashamael and Lord benhoidal are seen exiting the arena and approach.

Lord ashamael: “Ha! bds9992 is finished. Now we definitely won’t have to deal with him in the next Savage War!”

Lord benhoidal: “I don’t know. I wouldn’t count bds9992 out yet. I have a feeling he’ll be back.”

Lord dh555 catches up with them panting.

Lord dh555: “Tie him up. Bring him to the steps of the Sept of Baylor the Bricklayer. And someone bring me my sword.”

Our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Episode 26: The Throne
Upon a dark background, white block letters say ‘PREVIOUSLY ON GAME OF ZONES’. The Os are filled in as though they are basketballs.

Scene opens to the stands of the great arena. Lord jhsukow is talking with lord ysw128, and Lord Gerry the Red.

Lord jhsukow: “Oh, you haven’t heard? Whomever wins between Lord pexetera and Lord dBKC, the other is going to start a rebellion. Lords are already choosing who to follow. Then there’s Lord mptrey. If he can get two teams into the finals, he might have a chance.”

We cut to the streets of King’s Landing where bds9992 is madly sprinting through the streets. He is pushing women and children out of his way and running as fast as he can. We see a sword hurtling down from high above, straight towards bds9992. The sword comes down and strikes him right in the ankle. bds9992 lets out a scream of agony and collapses in a puddle of mud. Knights and lords surround him.

Lord dh555: “Tie him up. Bring him to the steps of the Sept of Baylor the Bricklayer. And someone bring me my sword.”

The screen darkens to black and we see a disclaimer in white letters appear: ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS CARTOON, EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL PEOPLE, ARE FICTIONAL AND ALL VOICES ARE OBVIOUSLY IMPERSONATED. The letters disappear and new letters take its place: GAME OF ZONES. The Os are basketballs. These letters too disappear and a cartoon knight is seen dribbling a basketball between his legs next to new letters: SEASON 2 - EPISODE 26: The Throne

Scene opens to a dark and grimy dungeon cell with no windows. In the center of the room we see a short unkempt man, unshaven with long dark hair covering his eyes. As we zoom in closer, we see that it is bds9992. He is sitting on the floor and staring at the wall unblinkingly.

The air over in front of bds9992 starts to shimmer and a red devil pops onto the screen. It has a spindly and pointed tail and is carrying an elongated pitchfork. It is wearing the robes of a red priest and beneath its pointed horns we see the face of Lord benhoidal.

bds9992: “Why do you insist on showing up every time I am here?”

Lord benhoidal: “I have a proposition for you. A trade.”

bds9992 looks up frantically. “No way. I am never trading with you. I’ve heard all the stories. No deal!”

Lord benhoidal: “Even if I can save your life?”

bds9992: “What? How?”

Lord benhoidal: “I still control Lord dh555. He is still acting ruler of the Savage Lands until the next king is crowned. I can have him send you to The Wall instead of executing you.”

bds9992: “But at The Wall I will never get to see the Suns again. I’ll never be able to see Sir Ayton become better than Sir Doncic.”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

bds9992: “It’s going to happen. Sir Doncic has already peaked.”

Lord benhoidal: “...”

bds9992: “Sir Ayton will be better, I promise you.”

Lord benhoidal: “Enough of this nonsense. Dammit man I’m offering you a chance to live and you ramble on about things that don’t matter. Do you want to live?”

bds9992: “I suppose so.”

Lord benhoidal: “Excellent. You must do one thing for me first however.”

bds9992: “Anything.”

Lord benhoidal: “Trade me Sir LeBron.”

bds9992: “What?”

Lord benhoidal: “The third Savage War is about to start. With Sir LeBron I will be unstoppable.”

bds9992: “I don’t know. I couldn’t even make the final tilts. Are you sure you want him?”

Lord benhoidal: “Hold out your hand.”

bds9992 obliges and Lord benhoidal grasps his hard with his own. We hear him mutter something under his breath and flames emerge, surrounding the handshake. bds9992 gasps and tries to pull away, but finds that he cannot.

Lord benhoidal: “Don’t worry, it won’t hurt. Much.”

The flames continue to spread up the two arms and soon engulf the entire bodies of the two men. They linger for a moment and then die out.

Lord benhoidal pulls his arm back. “It is done. As long as you shall live, Sir LeBron is mine.”

He tilts his head back, lets out a maniacal laugh and disappears with a ‘pop.’ bds9992 looks around bewildered, before going back to stare at the wall.

We cut to the great arena and zoom in on the standings on the grand scoreboard on the sideline. Lord pexetera is in first place with 350 points. Lord mptrey and Lord dBKC are tied in second with 324 points. Next to the point totals, the scoreboard displays the matchups for the five final tilts:

Court 1: Lord pexetera v. Lord amerk1180
Court 2: Lord mptrey v. Lord 24kpyrite
Court 3: Lord dh555 v. Lord robusk
Court 4: Lord dskantor v. Lord jcred5
Court 5: Lord mptrey v. Lord dBKC

We cut to the sidelines of Court five where Lord dBKC is talking to Lord mptrey.

Lord dBKC: “Well, looks like I can no longer win the throne, but I’m still going to fight you off for second place. May the best lord win.”

Lord mptrey: “I can still win it all if I win both kerfuffles, eh?”

Lord dBKC: “Yes, I think if you win on both of your courts you will be the king no matter what Lord pexetera does… but you forgot one thing.”

Lord mptrey: “Sincerest apologies. What did I forget, eh?”

The camera zooms in on lord dBKC.
Lord dBKC: “It’s my ************* birthday.”

Lord mptrey: “Then I shall be a party pooper, eh?” He turns towards the field. “Sir Chris Paul, show this cake eater what we’re made of, eh?”

We zoom in on the courtyard and see a short knight in the middle of the field. His visor is down and we cannot see his face, but he is wearing armor with a number three on the back. He is carrying a great sword that he does not seem to be able to lift very high. He approaches Sir Stephen and Sir Simmons from Lord dBKC’s army.

On the sideline, Lord dBKC leans over to Lord mptrey: “Watch out, Sir Stephen can strike from anywhere on the courtyard. Sir Simmons has to get really close, but once he does, he is lethal from three feet and in.”

Lord mptrey: “They are no match for my greatest knight, eh?”

Back on the courtyard, Sir Chris Paul stumbles a bit before advancing towards the other two knights. He starts to cross his sword from his right hand to his left and then back.”

Lord dBKC: “Sir Chris Paul doesn’t seem like himself today.”

Lord mptrey: “Nonsense.” He shouts onto the field, “Show him your ‘Killer Crossover’, eh?”

Sir Chris Paul crosses the sword back to his left hand, then brings it to his right. As the sword leaves his left hand, it slips and goes flying to the side. We follow the blade’s path as it zooms towards the sideline, right towards Lord mptrey.

Lord mptrey’s eyes widen and he manages to get out one last “Eh?” before the sword impales him.

The crowd gasps and the next second we see someone in a red shirt run onto the courtyard and towards the knight who just killed Lord mptrey. The knight lifts the visor of his helmet to look at the fallen lord and we realize it is not actually Sir Chris Paul, just someone who looks like him. He turns back towards the man in the red shirt.

Fake Sir Chris Paul: “Oh, Jake from State Farm.”

Jake from State Farm: “Here’s the deal. There’s no replacing the real Sir Chris Paul.”

We see the real Sir Chris Paul running onto the courtyard. He looks over at Lord mptrey. “Man, what happened?” He turns toward the courtyard and sees the imposter. “Who are you? You stole my sword!”

The imposter looks from left to right, trying to figure out what to do. Finally, he makes a break for it. He scrambles to the doors of the arena, but instead of opening the doors, he blasts through them. “I’m the real Sir Chris Paul!!!!!!”

We pan over to Lord dBKC who is examining the body. “Well I guess, Lord mptrey won’t be the next king. That leaves only one lord.”

Behind him, grinning smugly with his arms crossed, is Lord pexetera.

We cut to the steps of the great Sept of Baylor the Bricklayer.

bds9992, is being dragged down the street with his hands tied behind his back by Sir Garnett and Sir Jimmy.

There is a massive crowd in attendance to witness the execution of bds9992 and they are in an uproar. As the two knights drag bds9992 to the top step, we hear a few things they are saying.

“Traitor!”

“King Slayer!”

“Defier of logic and reason!”

“You couldn’t win even with LeBron!”

“Shame!”

The two knights bring bds9992 to the very top step. There waiting for him, we see King pexetera, newly crowned and smiling a smug smile. The Hand of the King, Lord dh555, stands next to him, eyes fogged over. He nods at bds9992 as he passes. Sir Garnett and Sir Jimmy let go of bds9992 and go to stand next to their king.

We zoom in on bds9992. He surveys the crowd with a pained expression on his face. “I am bds9992. I am immune to logic and reason, and I…”

King pexetera grumbles… “Not that confession bds9992. The other one.”

bds9992: “Yes of course.” He looks over at Lord dh555 who nods at him once more. bds9992 sighs, then raises his voice for all to hear.

bds9992: “I come before you to confess my treason. In the sights of the SIM gods and men, I betrayed the faith of my king and the trust of my friend kinoa1. I plotted to steal his throne, and before his blood was cold, I devised a plan to kill the other lords of the realm as well. I killed King Kinoa, 1st of his name.”

A rock is thrown from the spectators and hits bds9992 in the face. We hear more jeers from the crowd.

Lord dh555 steps forward, his eyes still glazed. He raises his hands to quiet the crowd. “As we sin, so do we suffer. This man has confessed his crimes in sight of the SIM gods and men. The SIM gods are just, but they can also be merciful.” He turns to look at King Pexetera. “What is to be done with this traitor Your Grace?”

King pexetera smiles and raises his hand towards the audience. “My Lord Hand wishes to have me send bds9992 to the Night’s Watch. Stripped of all titles and powers he would serve the realm in permanent exile.”

bds9992 quips: “But I already have no titles or powers?”

King pexetera ignores this. “But, this is not the time for mercy. Lord pharrop was killed at his table the other day drinking a glass of wine. Lord ysw128 was killed last night while yodeling strange words. And Lord dskantor was killed this morning doing something or other. I didn’t really know him that well. The ‘Kool Kids’, as they call themselves, have started to attack the lords of this realm. As of this morning, they have fled the city and are planning their rebellion as we speak.”

We cut quick to a shot of a great ship sailing away from King’s Landing. Lord dBKC is at the wheel gazing out into the distance. Lord robusk and Lord ashamael are on either side of him. Behind them is Lord jhsukow who is drawing something on his sketch pad. Behind him are a few other lords that haven’t made appearances yet. And finally behind them we see Lord benhoidal who is greedily staring into a crystal globe. We zoom in on the globe and see that he is watching the scene at the Sept. We zoom into the globe and rejoin the crowd.

Lord pexetera: “So long as I am your king, treason shall never go unpunished. I am the King of the Savage Lands now, and we shall do things the Savage way. Sir Jimmy… Bring me his head!”

Lord dh555 jolts forward in front of bds9992, but Sir Jimmy roughly pushes him aside as he steps towards bds9992. The crowd is in a frenzy. Lord dh555 jumps to King Pexetera and tries to speak, but the King brushes him aside.

bds9992 is looking around half in confusion and half in terror. From behind him, Sir Garnett shoves his head down onto a block. We see a childlike glee on Sir Jimmy’s face as he raises his great sword.

bds9992 looks up and into the crowd. We see the spectators jeering, but can no longer hear them. It is silent. bds9992 closes his eyes in acceptance and bows his head. All we hear is the sound of a sword slicing through the air.

We cut away quickly back to the ship and to Lord benhoidal who is watching the globe in shock. We hear a faint “Thunk” and Lord benhoidal starts sobbing as he stares hopelessly at the globe.

Lord benhoidal: “So close! I was so close to having Sir LeBron!”

We cut back to King’s Landing where the crowd is in an uproar. We zoom in on King pexetera who is smugly walking over towards the throne that has been set up on the Sept stairs. He sits down on the throne and watches over the commotion with a slight smile on his face.

We zoom down the steps. Daunting music plays and the camera lingers on the severed head of bds9992 as our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

Season 2 - Epilogue
Scene opens to a large field near the outskirts of King’s Landing. We see row upon row of tombstones lining the field and going on further than our eyes can see. The first snow of the season is upon us and large flakes are slowly drifting down. We zoom in on a row of tombstones and see the names of some of the fallen lords of the tournament. We see the names Lord dskantor, Lord pharrop, Lord ysw128, and Lord mptrey engraved in the stones. Next to these, we see an empty grave with a very small tombstone lying next to it. The stone reads, “Here lies bds9992. May he finally win a tournament in the next world.”

Near the empty grave we see two knights hoisting a coffin. It is Sir Westbrook and Sir Cheeks, formally of bds9992’s army. Behind them, playing his lute and hobbling about on a bad ankle is Dame the Bard. The two knights set the casket down beside the grave and bow their heads.

Sir Cheeks: “I can’t believe he’s gone. All the other lords made fun of me when I went at the end of the third round, but bds9992 defended me. He may not have been the best Lord, but he was my friend.”

Sir Westbrook: “He will be missed.”

Sir Cheeks: “He was always so enthusiastic and creative. I always wondered how he came up with some of those theories of his.”

Sir Westbrook: “He was so smart. None of the other lords would have drafted me at the end of the fifth round. Great head on his shoulders.”

Dame the Bard: “Not anymore!”

Sir Cheeks: “Too soon man. We managed to grab both his head and the body so that he can lie in peace.”

Dame the Bard: “I think the whole realm will finally be at peace now that he isn’t around to stir up trouble.

Sir Cheeks: “What are you doing here anyways?”

Dame the Bard: “I’m writing a new ballad. ‘The Life and Death of bds9992’. Do you want to hear?”

Sir Cheeks: “No, It’s too soon.”

Sir Westbrook. “Too soon.”

The two knights lift the casket once more and place it inside the grave. They both grab a shovel and start to cover it with dirt.

Sir Westbrook: “Weren’t you still working on that ballad of the tournament?”

Dame the Bard: “Oh I finished that one. Might be my best work. King pexetera has banned music from the realm, however. I miss the days where lords sat around talking about music. I’ll have to join the ‘Kool Kids’ rebellion if I’m ever going to get a chance to play at court again.”

Sir Cheeks: “The ‘Kool Kids’ rebellion?”

Dame the Bard: “I can’t believe you haven’t heard! Lords dBKC, robusk, ashamael, and benhoidal have fled the city along with a number of other lords they have recruited. I think Lord jhsukow has fled with them.”

Sir Westbrook: “I thought he was going to be the new Hand of the King?”

Dame the Bard: “No. He turned down the offer and is off with the ‘Kool Kids’ now. I think Lord dh555 is staying on as Hand.”

Sir Cheeks: “So, there’s really going to be another Savage War isn’t there?”

Dame the Bard: “It certainly seems that way.”

Sir Westbrook: “I don’t think the realm can take any more Savagery.”

Sir Cheeks: “There are certainly dark days ahead. I guess we could all use some cheer. Go ahead, Dame, sing us that song of yours. The one about the tourney.”

Dame the Bard: “Really?”

Sir Cheeks: “Really. Let’s hear it.”

Dame the Bard’s grin stretches from ear to ear as he grabs his lute. The sun begins to set and as Sir Cheeks and Sir Westbrook continue to fill the grave, Dame the Bard starts to play. A pleasant melody greets our ears as he starts to sing.

“Do I have a story for you m’lord,
Though I fear it doesn’t end well.
The King is dead, the King is dead!
Go ring the SAVAGE bell.

The Hand threw a great tourney,
The winner gets claim to the throne.
Knights came from all ‘cross the land,
So begins the Game of the Zone.

Lords gathered round and swords were drawn
To see who would have the first pick.
When the sword that was drawn was for bds,
Sir LeBron fainted and turned sick.

Lord Gerry the Red then drafted Sir Wilt,
The Goliath of Dipperville.
Wilt lost his eyes, his ears, his voice,
When he joined the Guild of No Evil.

Sir Stephen the great water dancer,
There’s no strike that he couldn’t make.
T’was his lord’s motherf*cking birthday,
So Sir Stephen baked him a cake.

Oh, there was a great feast, the Hand made a speech,
Two lords, they choked on a pie.
But the Captain said that’s not why they died,
T’was bds that poisoned the wine.

Sir Shaq the great Lord Commander,
Was suspicious and examined their goblets.
He started to investigate,
Determined to catch the culprit!

Sir Michael of Jordan was holding court,
With all Lord tarheel’s men.
But when they questioned his leadership,
He beat them again and again.

Sir Frazier of the King’s Guard,
Was happy as could be.
But when he went to find Sir Shaq,
T’was a new knight beneath the tree.

Sir Karl the Sitemail Man,
His job was to tend to the Ravens.
He uncovered a plot, who should he tell?
Sir Karl was timid and craven.

Sir Charles of the Round Mound,
And his faithful second Sir Steve,
Dueled Sir Karl the Sitemail Man,
They will fight for eternity.

Mayor Hoiberg created a robot,
A fighting machine with no limits.
T’was the perfect knight in every way,
Oh no, he forgot to add minutes!

Lord amerk was mad at all the delays,
And so got extremely petty.
He got **** on by birds, not once but twice,
And in the end he screamed ‘Spaghetti!’

Now back to the story of bds,
He’s rotting in a jail.
Lord pexetera’s men, the Wolves of the North,
Refused to pay his bail.

So begins the trial of bds,
The whole realm held its breath.
He demanded to live or die by the sword,
Trial by combat to the death!

The Three Eyed Bird of Bostonia,
Sees more than you or I.
Oh the secrets that he has to tell,
Like how King Kinoa died.

It is now time for the All-Star break,
But which knights get to play?
Sir Wilt the Goliath of Dipperville,
Convincingly led the way.

Sir Giannis the Freak was unhappy,
And Sir Conley sensed the danger.
So while Sir Giannis was on a break,
He took a vial from a stranger.

The Bearded Knight likes to cook,
His new lord won't let him try.
But after a while he finally snapped,
And cooked him into a pie.

The Spaghetti Lord from ‘cross the sea,
Was always late to pick.
When he was challenged by Lord amerk,
He dueled the little *****.

Now, the Doctor’s in to treat the wounds
Of all the fallen men.
Sir Kyrie was brought in and told a strange tale,
And was laughed at again and again.

Let the playoffs begin, said the Hand of the King,
But not for every Lord.
While most still fought on, three were left out,
And Sir Rodman tried courting a whore.

Now, the Devil may dance in the moonlight,
He’ll turn straw to gold for a night.
What tricks will he play, when he shows up to fight?
Wait, which Devil do you mean tonight?

It’s Lord ashamael the Forsaken.
He has the Devil locked in his own tower.
What plans does he have? we may never know,
Beware the Devil’s power.

Moment of silence for Lord 20ks,
Plunged a dagger through his heart.
Sir Paul George tried to set his boat aflame,
But Playoff P was off the mark.

Oh, Lord jhsukow likes to make fun
Of all the lords of the land.
Will he choose to fight for the ‘Kool Kids’?
Or will he become Lord pexetera’s Hand?

Sir Horford of the Longest and Tallest House
Fought hard for his sleepy lord.
But never has he had to fight harder,
Then when he was told to hold the ford.

Lord ysw watched the fights
Of all the knights who were better.
The other lords wanted to talk,
yeah, sure, whatever.

The two red priests had to watch,
As the other lords passed them by.
These two has-beens weren’t SAVAGE enough,
So now they must figure out why.

The conference finals were now done and gone,
Wait! What’s that on court one?
It’s Sir LeBron’s last stand. bds had to run.
But the Sky Hook ended his fun.

The “Real Sir Chris Paul” stepped into the battle,
After he stole a great sword.
Jake from State Farm tried to save the day,
But he was too late to save his lord.

The Hand said bds could take the black,
It’s better than being dead.
But the new king of the SAVAGE Lands,
Made sure bds lost his head.

The second SAVAGE war was done and gone,
Lord pexetera ascended the throne.
It is now time for SAVAGE three!
So ends the Game of the Zone.
So ends the Game of the Zone.”

Dame the Bard ends with a flourish of notes on his lute just as Sir Cheeks and Sir Westbrook fill the grave with the last of the dirt. The three knights sit in silence for a moment as the sun disappears and the sky grows dark. The snow has gotten heavier now and is falling down in sheets.

A loud cracking sound is heard and the three knights turn their heads sharply towards the newly filled in grave. A bony hand emerges from the dirt. The three knights jump back in alarm and fall to the snowy ground. More bones emerge from the grave until an entire body is standing in front of them. It has no head. It reaches down into the grave and pulls out the unmistakable head of bds9992. It’s eyes are shut, but when it opens them we see that they are icy blue. The body of bds9992 holds the head under one arm and walks forward at the three knights who are scrambling away. Dame the Bard is still hobbled and cannot get away fast enough. bds9992 grabs a sword on the ground and stabs him through the gut. He then pulls out the blade and throws it across the field.

We pan to Sir Westbrook and Sir Cheeks who are running as fast as they can through the grave stones. The blade flies through the air and strikes Sir Westbrook right between the shoulders. Sir Cheeks stops and crouches over his fallen comrade’s body. He looks up and we see the thing that was once bds9992 approach. Sir Cheeks backs up slowly. The thing reaches down and pulls the sword out of Sir Westbrook’s back.

Sir Cheeks: “My L...L...Lorrrrd… puh..puh...please. I was your greatest defender!”

bds9992 raises the blade with one hand and swings it down. Sir Cheeks crumbles to the ground.

bds9992 starts to walk away. He sheaths the sword in a scabbard and grips his head with both hands. He places it gently on his severed neck. It starts out backwards, but when he moves his hands away from the head, it straightens out on its own accord.

bds9992 raises both of his arms and behind him the corpses of the three knights raise from the ground. Dame the Bard has a bloody hole in his chest. Sir Westbrook as one in his back. Sir Cheeks has a slash mark across his face. The three knights stumble forward with inhuman motions until they are just behind bds9992. He drops his arms and starts to march towards the capital, the three knights falling in line behind him.

We zoom in on the icy blue eyes of bds9992. Then, our screen goes black and white block letters take over the screen: GAME OF ZONES.

A moment later those letters are replaced with new ones:

SAVAGE 3 IS COMING.



https://soundcloud.com/benjamin-hoidal/lets-get-savage-vol-ii

great ****.

Interested to see what different archetypes you use/come up with; like the owner who's just happy to be there, the one that acts casual but takes it way too serious internally, the one who misremembers important player info, etc.

Posted by jpevans31 on 8/6/2020 7:57:00 PM (view original):
Interested to see what different archetypes you use/come up with; like the owner who's just happy to be there, the one that acts casual but takes it way too serious internally, the one who misremembers important player info, etc.

I have some ideas on where I want to go with this. I’m planning on tying all the episodes together with a couple common themes, and I have a brief outline for a couple of episodes. But it’s mostly all blank so far. Any and all ideas are welcome!