I'm not worried with your daughter, she probably tops 280 by now. And I don't have one.

That baldheaded dude from Idol can't sign for ****.

Probably not. But, like the Winter Olympics, I may catch some of it while I'm waiting for something I want to watch to come on.

um you didn't answer my du="aughter" s queation correctly did you
?

also can you tell i'm drunk?

so what's wrong ith hookij up with peoples underage daughters ans screwing the chit out of them is what i mean to ask?

would you fuk Danica Patrivk given teh chance? i know i would.

how did you sorrectly conclude that i would not win at hte poker tablt toinet?

Yes.

Either that or you're big, fat faker.

Underage seems to be legal issue.

I'm married.

I see dead people. And other stuff. Like you losing at the table.

One of the Obama administration's ideas for preventing the imminent carp invasion is to close the locks a couple days a week. Do carp only swim into Great Lakes on Tuesdays and Thursdays?

Maybe, at the carp summit, the carp agreed to restricted swimming.

who the hell cares about a bunch of stupid carp?

Are the people that care about the carp the one's that live in that part of the country? What does a carp taste like?

kermit and President Obama to name two.

Pretty much. And enviromentalists.

My father once told me how to prepare carp. Something like this: Gut and clean the carp. Place him on a fresh cut piece of oak wood. Put your preferred salt, pepper and spices on the carp. Bake until the carp is fully cooked. Remove from oven, throw the carp in the garbage and eat the wood. So I'm guessing carp tastes worse than seasoned wood.

Live 5,000m speedskating! Each pair takes six-plus minutes to finish the course! Could anything be more exciting?

Most exciting six minutes in sports!!

No, wait, that's the Kentucky Derby and it's only two minutes. Never mind. The event you're talking about probably sucks.

212 pounds!!! Biggest sturgeon ever posted in your thread?

jstrugis has posted in this thread. Not sure how much he weighs.

y or Righty?

I think strugis is a righty.

I always thought that the Canadian Association of Retired People could have done better with their name. Agree?

Righty.

If you're retired, you should have Canada long ago. Staying in a country that butchers the Opening Ceremonies when you're old is just plain stupid.