Go ahead. Laugh your *** off at this mess:

February 19, 2012          Tim Burke
February 23, 2012          Rondell White
February 28, 2012          Rufino Linares
March 23, 2012              Gavvy Cravath
April 2, 2012                  Hughie Jennings
April 6, 2012                  Brett Boone
April 17, 2012                Cap Anson
June 9, 2012                   Randy Winn
June 10, 2012                 Elias Sosa
June 15, 2012                 Wade Boggs
June 27, 2012                 Jim Edmonds
July 18, 2012                 Joe Torre
August 5, 2012              John Olerud
August 21, 2012            John Wetteland
August 29, 2012            Roy Oswalt
September 23, 2012       Matt Kemp
October 21, 2012           Whitey Ford
October 29, 2012           Karim Garcia
November 2, 2012         Ron Reed
November 16, 2012       Dwight Gooden
November 18, 2012       Jack Coombs
November 29, 2012       Jake Weimer
December 17, 2012        Chase Utley
December 21, 2012        Tom Henke
December 26, 2012        Doc Farrell

January 5, 2012 - Milt Thompson
February 2, 2012 - Orval Overall
February 20, 2012 - Frankie Gustine
February 25, 2012 - Paul O'Neill
February 29, 2012 - Al Rosen
March 7, 2012 - JR Richard
March 25, 2012 - Frank Dwyer
April 1, 2012 - Jeff Heath
April 8, 2012 - Lady Baldwin
April 11, 2012 - Jim Hearn
April 17, 2012 - Cap Anson
May 19, 2012 - Gil McDougald
May 27, 2012 - Jeff Bagwell
June 14, 2012 - Charlie Buffinton
July 7, 2012 - Chuck Knoblauch
August 2, 2012 - Huston Street
August 5, 2012 - John Olerud
August 18, 2012 - Max Lanier
August 22, 2012 - Carl Yastrzemski
September 8, 2012 - Mike Rivera
September 17, 2012 - John Franco
October 11, 2012 - Tom Carey
November 2, 2012 - Greg Harris
November 12, 2012 - Sammy Sosa
December 10, 2012 - Doug Henry

January 1, 2012 - Hank Greenberg
January 6, 2012 - Norm Charlton
January 13, 2012 - Kevin Mitchell
February 18, 2012 - Louis LeRoy
February 21, 2012 - Alan Trammell
February 26, 2012 - Pete Alexander
April 8, 2012 - Lady Baldwin
April 21, 2012 - Ken Caminiti
April 23, 2012 - Rheal Cormier
June 28, 2012 - Ken Williams
July 18, 2012 - Johnny Hopp
July 25, 2012 - Billy Wagner
July 30, 2012 - Casey Stengel
August 21, 2012 - John Wetteland
September 9, 2012 - Frankie Frisch
September 16, 2012 - Oral Hershiser
September 18, 2012 - Brent Lillibridge
October 18, 2012 - Roy Cullenbine
October 28, 2012 - Frank Smith
October 30, 2012 - Ed Delahanty
November 5, 2012 - Javy Lopez
November 28, 2012 - Rob Nen
December 15, 2012 - Doug Rau
December 20, 2012 - Gabby Hartnett
December 24, 2012 - Victor Cruz

jan 1     hank greenberg
jan 3     gary lavelle
feb 28     rufino linares
mar 8     carl furillo
mar 19     clayton kershaw
mar 23     gavvy cravath
mar 25     tom glavine
apr 28     jackie brandt
may 16     mitch webster
may 22     al simmons
june 20     jim delhanty
june 30     johnny miljus
july 1          roger connor
july 17     lou boudreau
july 19     phil cavarretta
july 21     al hrabosky
july 28     vida blue
aug 9     ted simmons
aug 27     jose vidro
aug 31     eddie plank
sept 28     todd worrell
oct 24          arthur rhodes
dec 5          ed summers
dec 17          cy flakenberg
dec 18          ty cobb

dweigel
 
Here are your 25 calendar dates:
 
January 12, 2012        Tim Hulett
February 18, 2012      John Mayberry     
February 22, 2012      J. J. Putz
March 25, 2012           Lee Mazzilli     
March 31, 2012           Marv Grissom
April 24, 2012             Chipper Jones     
May 3, 2012                Eppa Rixey
May 15, 2012              John Smoltz     
May 22, 2012              Al Simmons
June 10, 2012            Garland Braxton
June 11, 2012            Roger Bresnahan
June 14, 2012            Randy Tomlin
July 7, 2012               Billy Herman
July 24, 2012             Jack Clements
August 8, 2012          Toad Ramsey
August 10, 2012        Mike Schooler
August 23, 2012        George Kell
August 24, 2012        Cal Ripken Jr.
August 27, 2012        Ed Herrmann
September 3, 2012    Luis Gonzalez
September 27, 2012  Whit Wyatt
October 25, 2012       Pedro Martinez
October 27, 2012       Ralph Kiner
November 28, 2012   Robb Nen
December 2, 2012     Peter Moylan

January 16, 2012 ferdie schupp
January 24, 2012 rob dibble
January 29, 2012 jason schmidt
February 7, 2012 dan quisenberry
February 23, 2012 elston howard 
March 2, 2012 mel ott
March 13, 2012 frank baker
April 18, 2012 brady clark
May 11, 2012 charlie gehringer
May 16, 2012 dave philley
July 1, 2012 roger connor
July 27, 2012 arod
August 14, 2012 joe horlen
September 14, 2012 dave hillman
September 23, 2012 matt kemp
October 13, 2012 trevor hoffman
October 15, 2012 bill henry
October 28, 2012 johnny rigney
October 31, 2012 eddie taubensee
November 22, 2012 joe nathan
November 24, 2012 joe medwick
November 26, 2012 hugh duffy
November 27, 2012 dave guisti
December 13, 2012 jack taylor
December 27, 2012 jeff d'amico

Here are your 25 calendar dates:

January 29, 2012 John Habyan
February 8, 2012 Hoot Evers
March 10, 2012 Steve Howe
April 5, 2012 Ron Hansen
April 8, 2012 Charlie Maxwell
April 15, 2012 Mike Diaz
May 14, 2012 Ed Walsh
June 2, 2012 Bryan Harvey
June 3, 2012 Jim Gentile
June 19, 2012 Lou Gehrig
June 20, 2012 Dickie Thon
June 22, 2012 Carl Hubbell
June 24, 2012 Doug Jones
July 14, 2012 Chuck Rainey
July 16, 2012 Joe Jackson
July 28, 2012 Vida Blue
August 2, 2012 Tom Burgmeier
September 19, 2012 Joe Morgan
September 25, 2012 Joel Pineiro
September 29, 2012 Heath Bell
October 2, 2012 Maury Wills
October 14, 2012 Tommy Harper
November 7, 2012 Jake Gibbs
December 7, 2012 Johnny Bench
December 25, 2012 Rickey Henderson

January 22, 2012     Amos Strunk
February 5, 2012     Hank Aaron
March 1, 2012          Larry Brown
March 6, 2012          Ted Abernathy
March 13, 2012          Johan Santana
March 15, 2012          Bob Locker
March 19, 2012          Richie Ashburn
April 7, 2012               John McGraw
April 12, 2012          Addie Joss
May 6, 2012          Willie Mays
May 15, 2012          George Brett
May 31, 2012          Andrew Bailey
June 21, 2012          Jay Pettibone
August 1, 2012          Gregg Jefferies
September 7, 2012     Jason Isringhausen
October 4, 2012          Frankie Crosetti
October 24, 2012          Rafael Furcal
October 26, 2012          Francisco Liriano
October 28, 2012          Frank Smith
November 8, 2012          Wally Westlake
November 10, 2012          Norm Cash
November 27, 2012          Ivan Rodriguez
December 6, 2012          Tony Lazzeri
December 20, 2012          Gabby Hartnett
December 24, 2012          Kevin Millwood

January 13, 2012     Kevin Mitchell
January 30, 2012     Bob Henley
February 3, 2012     Fred Lynn
February 4, 2012     Doug Fister
February 9, 2012     Heinie Zimmerman
February 10, 2012     Lance Berkman
March 14, 2012     Kevin Brown
March 23, 2012     Gavvy Cravath
March 29, 2012     Cy Young
April 4, 2012     Tris Speaker
April 6, 2012     Bret Boone
April 30, 2012     Phil Garner
May 3, 2012     Davey Lopes
May 5, 2012     Chief Bender
June 6, 2012     Bill Dickey
June 24, 2012     Doug Jones
July 5, 2012     Rich Gossage
July 10, 2012     Buddy Groom
July 20, 2012     Heinie Manush
August 7, 2012     Bill McKechnie
August 10, 2012     Odell Hale
September 14, 2012     Kid Nichols
November 25, 2012     Octavio Dotel
November 30, 2012     Steve Hamilton
December 10, 2012     Jimmy Johnston