NOTES: this league has come as a surprise to me... the draft seems interesting and speculative, and forward moving. i'm tickled pink. So, let's have a little fun...
Sassy Butt Evals... (preliminary)
empdenied: the overall NO.1 selection in the draft (sf's) and he comes up with lebron? ha! what a dope. barkley came knockin' with his bags and u turned him away. the chuck wagon will be bar-b-que-ing the king and hairy the horse gallatin (lol) come dinner time. chauncey? i shrug my big shoulders. wade, paul or stockton. sheesh. B-
xxevilixx: nice drafting behind emp... barkley or jordan? barkley or bird? barkley or rodman? ha! what a dope. after an all night flight to arrive on time, barkley comes knockin with his bags again. he gets the evil-eye. "true greatness only exists in his airness." that's how xxevilixx thinks, ya know? paul's not bad, a bit over rated in this sim. pricey, rarely leads the league in asts nor mvp votes. still, u had to get a true pg, and didn't need wade. but i think wade and jordan together, then go low usage on the rest would've been a dustcropper. the extinguisher! buck williams is efficient. B
longtallbrad: holy toledo! across the board stat fillers. none of 'em below 53% fg. stockton over paul. that season of his. 54%/44%... good god! the worm turns in chicago. pick no. 3 barkley-rodman? true greatness is orange hair. rodman! AND amare. they do what the other does not. that is chemistry. the three together... alchemy! A
shapandrew: sir charles arrives... finally!! ma, i'm home! where's my little brother, dwayne, ma?" "um, well, charles, ya see, the thing is, he's not..." "MA! my brother's white!" the chuck wagon's had little love thus far. what a dope, shap! still, if u lose wade, nash is a keeper and boozer is a load! barkley and boozer. cool tandem. nash will serve them well. live ammo here. A-
sweg: bird took flight and followed sir charles plane all around until finding a home in the sweg house. unfortunately, the sweg house has a 500 pound gorilla living in it. damn monkey smells. ya don't wanna pett-it either! he bites. then bird smiles. little terry porter is bouncing a basketball on the driveway, he and his 600+ dimes, 131-3's, nice usgae%, 58efg%. but this home has high taxes. can bird save the mortgage? C
dskantor: mookie needs mason's asts, mason needs mailman's points, malone needs mookie's 3's (since he is a sf)... each has what the other needs... NOT each does what the other cannot do... there is gonna be some serious constipation on the court with these three ex-lax types. mookie went way to high (for the sake of 3's?) and mason doesn't belong in the top pf's of all time, no matter what kind of team u'r building. aren't i sweet? C-
calcutta: cal's got the mojo runnin'... magic to wade, back to magic, alley-oop to walton! walton? he can jump? fast break dragons get slowed up by carrot top. walton is ok, but i can think of 3 or 4 better players to go with the dynamic duo (i know, u never thought u'd land wade). still, there's chemistry here and firepower. dimes all around. magic and walton have limited mins for their price tags. this is a very good team. B+
jakotay: truly, the only time anyone broke my heart in a draft league. losing T-Mac. And he goes to a guy who won't know what tracy likes in his water bottles, nor what kinds of towels he likes in the locker room... he will be disgruntled (thank god), and that's too bad because tmac gets to play with unseld and d. williams, guys well-suited to his game. any league i've had tmac, i've won. like the current funk52. tmac makes everyone better (including squirrley owners). unseld and dw are both dishwashers, so tracy will outdo his 45%fg. there's 3's, boards, points, dimes, efg%, and excitement. nice team. B+/A-
ff09: garnett's sf/6.0 ast season is my favorite, but he's 10.3 mil. no problemo since he'll be playing with ewing and fat, neither too pricey. what ewing brings, he brings bad things, lots of them, which is a good recipe if playing with garnett. ewing will foul, turn the ball over, and can't clean the glass on the offensive end. this will elevate garnett's game. ewing does shoot high% paint, which garnett doesn't. nice inside out there. fat just plays serious ball. no frills. quick hands. and boards. foundation is in place. nothing special yet, but could be. C+
swollencolon: seems fitting an owner with a name like swollon colon would draft a guy named mo cheeks... lol... but cheeks will be the catalyst on this squad. he gets to feed oscar all day while oscar feeds the rest of the team. getting a good dishman for big-O is so important. murphy brings 30% dreb and 3's... a bit of a whuss, imo, but will quietly do his job and give oscar operating room. with a guy like oscar, t.o.'s can get away from ya, but troy and mo do not turn the ball over nor foul... nor do they go to the line much, and that hurts. free points are needed in a 47 mil league, and only oscar is gonna get some. B-/C+
uvasooner: when i first designed this league, i had uva in mind at the no. 11 or 12 slot. and look what happened? uva came in at no. 11. it's a perfect experiment to see how the most successful owner in wisnba builds teams when he can't get top tier players. the matrix was no surprise. and a huge steal at no. 11. a crime really. a top tier player (whadd'ya guys doin' up there?). nater is just like marion, but instead of 3's and boards, he gives efficieny and boards, not in piles, but in medium sized doses (like oxycotton). 14 per game. 55%fg, 30% drebs, 70%ft etc. kj brings attitude. skills (like terry porter). this team sucks. since i'm the commish and get to re-align the divs... adios uva. pu-chor butt way up there in the atlantic! (u guys gave him marion?) A-
dh555: formidable inside out, IF dh can find that great scoring center. if not, a sg (no matter how good he is) will just stink up the joint. this would be a killer team with moses. but right now dh holds ben and peja. he also holds barros who needs someone to feed him and his sniper pal. but he really needs moses (u guys up there gonna give him one?). at the 12th spot in the center round, he's got a chance. as it stands right now... C+/B-